Thankful for Ken - Part 4

 While I understand that November is over and today is December, I have decided to continue sharing about Ken.  I am more convinced than ever that these stories are important (at least to our family) and have meaning even beyond that.  So much history is lost when people die without having memories saved in some way.  I have scrapbooks full of pictures and journals that tell the story of our life together after 1972.  My goal in sharing is to motivate you all to think of ways to tell your own stories so that they will not be lost.  Don't put this off.  Share them now!  Tell those stories verbally to your kids and grandkids, but more importantly, write them down.  Think about the stories that your parents told you and put those on paper.  We, as a society, have not done a good job of keeping our personal history for future generations.  Enough said.... on to my sharing for today.

After the last blog, I was thinking about some of Ken's best memories.  The stories that made him so happy to tell and retell.  This photo represents one of those cherished memories.  This is Ken getting a hair cut from his "Uncle Charlie".  Uncle Charlie was actually his mom's uncle. Charlie and Alva had a cabin in the Cooks Forest Pennsylvania and also had a home next door to Ken's grandparents in Nokomis Florida.  That cabin in the woods was the site of this haircut and so many great memories for Ken.  I never got to meet Charlie and Alva.  They were already living in an assisted living home by the time Ken and I got married.  On Ken's 21st birthday, his mom gave him a picture of this cabin that she had painted.  It hung in our hallway for many years.  The frame is broken and needs replacement now.  But Ken wanted Doug and Susie to have it. 

 On our last vacation in 2019, we went to Cook's Forest and tried to find the location of that cabin.  But with no real idea of where it was, we were not able to find it. Charlie and Alva were certainly like another set of grandparents for Ken.  Charlie and Alva had bought their home in Florida before Grandma and Grandpa Baker were retired, and many of the visits that Ken made to Casey Key before he was 8 were to visit Uncle Charlie and Aunt Alva.  Around 1960, Grandma and Grandpa Baker made Nokomis home and Ken became a regular visitor there.  

This picture was taken in 1976 and is Ken helping Grandma Baker clean up her palm tree.  Ken's mom is in the background.  The house is really Ken's very favorite place.  We recently drove by and the home is sadly not in very good shape anymore.  But it held so many great memories for Ken.  

After living in Ohio, Ken's parents moved to Pittsburg when Ken's dad took a new job there.  They only lived there about one and half years, but Ken often called Pittsburg home.  When we visited there in 2018, Ken was able to drive right up to their house and find his school with no problem!  

This was his one and only birthday in Pittsburg.  He never was much of a big sports fan, but he loved the Steelers and we have many hats to prove it.  

After that short time in Pittsburg, his family relocated to Russelville, KY.  Ken spent his entire Junior High years in this small, very southern town.  He loved the weather (warm year around with not much snow.  He said that one year they had 2" of snow and the town shut down).  He had a really good friend, John that he lost track of after moving to Illinois.   Something he always regretted.

During those years in Kentucky, Ken's parents purchased a lake lot on a nearby man-made lake, Lake Malone.  They also purchased a boat.  These were truly happy years for Ken.  He loved the lake and the boat.

One of our first driving vacations, we stopped in Russelville and revisted Ken's favorite spots.  We even kayaked on Lake Malone and found the lot that his parents had purchased.  It was truly beautiful.  In the last years I would often see Ken searching Zillow for property on Lake Malone.  It was a dream of his to someday own a house on that lake.

Of course after moving to Elk Grove, the lake lot and boat didn't make much sense.  They sold the lot first but kept the boat.  Anyone who lives around here knows that there is not a really good place to use a boat anywhere around Chicago (think small fishing boat, not a boat suitable for Lake Michigan).  His parents did keep it for a couple of years and they actually took one "camping trip" to Minnesota and Canada when Ken was about 15.  

His favorite memory of that trip was the fish that he caught while camping in Canada.  His parents were not really the camping sort, and shortly after that trip, they sold the boat.  Again, something that Ken always wanted, but we never had - a boat.  

As I was thinking of these blogs, I spent some time really trying to remember the memories that Ken held on to.  I think I have captured some of the stories and things about his life before we were together, that were important to him.  A few pictures and several paragraphs can't embody someone's life.  But it can give you a glimpse into a deeper part of a person that you might have only known casually.  Both Ken and I moved around as children, and we knew that it had impacted our childhoods.  So we did decide to stay rooted in one place.  Our kids only lived in one house growing up and I still live here! Whatever the reason, I am incredibly thankful for the years we have spent here in Warrenville.  And I am very thankful that Ken and I got to visit each of his childhood homes and I got to see and experience the places he lived.  We had plans to go to South Dakota and Minnesota in 2020 to visit each of my childhood homes, but illness and COVID intervened.  I can assure you that I intend to make that trip myself at some time in the future.  

If you haven't visited your childhood favorite places, I encourage you to do so!  Make plans now to take that trip - hopefully in 2021.  Look for those old pictures and make plans to call or write to (or Facebook message) those old friends.  Scrapbook and journal your memories.  Do it before it is too late.  Your children, your grandchildren, your friends and family will thank you.  

Jesus, thank you for your plan and purpose for each of us that you have known since before we were born.  Remind us of your presence with us during the good times and the hard times.  Holy Spirit, help us all to let go of the hurts and trouble from our past.  Jesus fill us with your love and surround us with your peace as we see the past with your perspective.  Give us renewed joy as we continue to walk through this challenging year.  Thank you Jesus for your love and care for each of us.  Amen

Thankful for Ken.... part one

I have been thinking about telling a few of Ken's stories to have them actually archived and available for the kids and grand kids.  I might have shared a few over the years, but I am sure not all have been "in one place".  This has especially been on my mind since November is Adoption month and there have been many stories shared surrounding families impacted by adoption.  This is a bit of Ken's story, starting at the beginning.... and remember that I am writing from bits and pieces of information that I have been told over the years - by Ken himself, by his family, and from documents we have.  He was born on May 14, 1952 but this is the first picture of him.  It is dated June 9, 1952, with the name Jimmy Joe.  This is the photo that was presented to his mom and dad, asking them if they wanted to adopt this baby.  He was called Jimmy Joe after the two doctors who delivered him.  He had spent some time in an incubator (we really don't know much about why, except that he was very small).   His parents were delighted to have him join their family and he actually came home from the hospital at the age of 6 weeks, somewhere at the end of June, 1952.  

 

This is the first family photo we have of Ken with his sister Sue (who was 7 1/2 years old), and his mom and dad on one of the first days he was home.  Ken would have told you that he always knew that he was adopted so he didn't have any time when he was "told" about his past.  Over the years I heard many different stories about exactly how Ken came to be in his family and why he was placed for adoption.  One story was that he had many older siblings but his birth father had died and his mother could not care for him.  It was even suggested that his father might have died in the Korean War.  We were also told that he was in some way "biologically" connected to his adopted family through a distant cousin who might have some connection to this baby.  The facts were always very sketchy.  Ken's mom had a real fear that he might try to find his birth parents and because of this, Ken never wanted to know anything about his ancestry.  After his mom died in 009 and his dad was moving to Florida, we came across his adoption papers for the first time.  We saw that his birth name was "baby boy Ferguson".  This was the first actual clue we had about his heritage.  We knew that in 1952 most babies were placed in homes with similar backgrounds and genetic makeup.  So the idea that he was English and Irish (similar to his adoptive family) made sense.  Finding this name confirmed that possibility. A few years ago, after his dad died, I finally convinced Ken to do an Ancestry DNA test in the hopes of locating some information about his family.  He was mostly English and Scottish with some Irish.  While he matched to a few first and second cousins we really didn't get any further on finding his birth family.  More about my continued search in a future blog!

Ken was always close to his maternal Grandparents, Grandpa Les Baker and Grandma Versal Baker. His earliest memories almost always included them.  Beginning when Ken was a baby, the entire family would travel to Florida to Nokomis and Casey Key.  

This badly damaged photo was taken on May 14, 1954 on Ken's second birthday He is walking on Casey Key.  The second photo was taken in 1955.  

These pictures remind me of just how much Ken loved Casey Key and why he made it his final wish for his ashes to be scattered there.  On every trip we made to Florida, Ken always wanted to at least stop and visit this beach.  And for me, it is special  since it is the first "ocean" (okay it is really the Gulf but to me it was an ocean) that I ever saw.  We went to Florida in 1976 when Grandpa Baker died.  And these two pictures were taken on that same beach.

The next two photos are the last time we were together on Casey Key in January of 2019.  He loved this place so much and I will end with the picture of him doing what he loved most.... taking pictures of the place he loved most.

So many more stories to share.  Not surprising since we spent 48 years together.  But also, so many memories and thoughts that I don't want to lose.  I hope you come along with me over the next few weeks, as I remember more about Ken and what was important to him.  

Jesus, thank you for bringing Ken and I together in your master plan.  Thank you for photos and memories that help us stay connected to our past and also help us to see your hand in our life.  Holy Spirit, help us all to be thankful during this month of Thanksgiving.   Give us reminders of your love, your care and your provision in every season of our lives.  Jesus, keep our eyes on you rather than on our current circumstances.  Shower us with your peace and your love.  Amen