Weekend recap and a time of contrasts and rest

So I last posted looking forward to my scrapbooking weekend.  Here is the result of the weekend.  I finished this entire book.... it was 61 pages and covered from June 1, 2013 through July 31, 2013. It included a long vacation with lots of pictures. This was a personal record for me!  Included in the weekend was a fun time swimming with the grandchildren.

Even Anna spent some time in the pool.  I don't think she totally "enjoyed" the pool since it was a bit cold for her.  But she stayed in the entire time.  The older kids had a great time.  I actually swam a number of laps before the kids got to the pool.  It was a nice time of relaxing along with lots of talking and of course, the scrapping.  I was telling a friend this morning that the time felt kind of quiet.  For some reason it was just a really calm, peaceful time yet I accomplished so much.  It seems kind of counter intuitive, but it happened.  

And then this morning...... this was out of my window...

We had about 6" of snow this morning.  Sigh,  Gone is our near springtime weather.  The grass is gone, again, and it seems bleak and dark.  The good news of this weather is that it is supposed to be 60 on Wednesday!  So this snow will not last long!  Wow, what an unusual few days!  On one hand my scrap time was calm and peaceful.... yet it was overly productive!  And then even though the calendar says that spring is here... there are inches of snow on the ground!   

Today I decided to clear out some of my massive amount of scrapbook supplies.  Since everything was already a jumbled mess after taking it all for the weekend, it was a perfect time to do this.  So I sorted and organized and I still have quite a ways to go.  I have one large trash bag of things that I wonder why I had been keeping.  And I have several stacks of items to give away.  The best part of this clear out is that I now know what I have and I can actually find it!  So I will have a little bit more time with a mess until everything is organized and rearranged, but it is so worth it!

Yes, this has been a few days of contrasts.  And I have also felt the contrasts in my emotions and in my spirit.  I have had times of feeling very joyful and upbeat, but there has also been times of sadness.  Currently there is a buzz around the internet and among my friends that there will be an amazing time of spiritual revival hitting the Chicago area soon.  There are a couple of upcoming events that have everyone feeling the mounting excitement.  I have been waiting and watching for the expectation and excitement to hit me.  I am attending one of those "big" events coming in April, but I have yet to feel anything at all.  I was talking to Jesus about that this morning and then I heard a very quiet and small simple word.  JUST REST!   That seems to be what was happening all weekend.  And even in the sorting and organizing today, I felt restful.  It is as if I am wrapped in rest and peace.  And it is a great place to be!  After I realized how wonderful this word was, I looked out at that snow and it actually seemed very pretty.  I put on my boots and went out and shoveled the driveway!  It was warm and the sun actually came out.  And melting was already happening.  I realized that I was looking out the other window (see my last blog)!  And I was filled with rest and peace.  Quite a good day!  

Jesus, thank you for this weekend and fellowship and fun.  Thank you for speaking and reminding me to just rest when I feel like there is something more that I should be feeling.  Holy Spirit, keep our focus on the things that you know are necessary and good for each of us.  Help us to except that what we need may not be what someone else needs.  Jesus, so many people are filled with anxiety and stress.  Help us all to JUST REST!  Thank you for all that you are doing in the Chicago area.  Keep our eyes and ears attuned to you rather than to people.  Amen

A time of Jubilee

So today we went directly from Summer into late Fall, sort of overnight.  It was actually COLD at the bus stop this morning with the kids.  As a matter of fact, I had to hit the closet shelves for the kids winter clothes.  Out with the shorts and in with the sweatshirts!   If we know one thing, living in Chicago, it is "if you don't like the weather, just wait a couple of hours, cuz it is bound to change!"
As a matter of fact, I can think of a couple of times that we experienced all 4 seasons in one day! I am sure that we will have some warmer weather in the next month, but for tonight, our heat is running!

I've been thinking a lot about the concept of "Jubilee".  This is a time of total rest.  It is also a time of celebration and worship. And it was a time of freedom and restoration.    Recently, it was suggested to me, that this might be my time of Jubilee. I have been blessed with this time of respite from work. And quite honestly, this is the first time that I have not been working since I had tiny babies.  And to top it off, I have the chance to spend time with my grandchildren as well as helping out my children.  What a blessing!  As I have been considering this jubilee, I have felt like it has been a time of entering into that quiet place in a whole new way.  With the arrival of the Jewish New Year, there have been many articles about a shift happening.  Last year (from September of 2013 to September of 2014) was the year of the door. This New Year is the year of the window!  This is what one prophet said about this.......

As we approach Rosh Hashanah, we'll transition from the year of the door to the year of the window. For 2015 the Jewish calendar shows the year 5775 as HEY (a window, looking, hands lifted, beholding something great, reveal.) Two Thousand and Fifteen will be a year of seeing: a year of watching and tremendous revelation. We will need to stand strong in our identity in Christ as we speak to the mountains that are revealed. As we take authority in Christ we are going to see huge advancements in the Kingdom of God, but not without a battle.We're also going to hear sounds of Jubilee like we've never heard before. We're going to hear sounds of victory and new music coming to the earth. New worship teams and worship leaders will emerge and lead us into the presence of the Lord like never before. We're entering a season of harvest and reward following hard work – a year of Jubilee. When we take a break from constant work and focus on Jesus and His window of revelation, our faith and trust are stretched, and consequently they grow. For those who put total trust in God there will be a rich reward. This will be a year of serving from a place of rest.

Isn't this exciting?  I am so happy that we are going from the door to the window.  And I love the further ideas of looking, hands lifted, beholding something great and and to reveal.  It is especially wonderful to know that this is a time of rest.  I have this picture in my mind of a beautiful scenic mountainside, with green grass and trees, flowers scattered around, and a lovely lake in the distance.  I see myself sitting in a wonderful, comfy chair just gazing out this floor to ceiling window, totally at rest. And it is a great place to have that quiet time!

Jesus, thank you for the seasons!  What a wonderful reminder that change is good.  Holy Spirit, thank you for the revelation of jubilee for me and the connection to the New Year.  Help us all to enter into a time of rest so that we can grow in our faith. Amen

Four year flashback

So today I was thinking about this new "app" that shows you flashbacks for past years.  I have not yet gotten that app, but when I was in a store today, a sales person was showing someone a picture from her phone on that app.  So when I got home, I did a little looking back myself, and realized that 4 years ago today (2010) Ken and I were just beginning one of our longest vacations ever!  I think I would have to say that this 2010 vacation was one of my all time favorite vacations.  This was our first "real" day of that vacation.  On the previous day we had traveled for 15 hours.  This was a long awaited day at Blackwater River State Park in Alabama, near to the Florida border.  We had tried to kayak at this location on a different trip, but it was 32 degrees and snowing on that day.  On this day in 2010 it was beautiful.  The water is really black appearing, caused by a mineral in the soil, but crystal clear.  The sand is the white sand just like the beaches of Pensacola.  For the first hour we were there it was wonderful and we had a quiet paddle.  Until about 9:00am.  Suddenly, it was just a sea of people along the entire stretch of the river.  And there were swimmers and floats and it was just crazy.  This was all caused by the oil spill that had closed all the ocean beaches in Pensacola and the surrounding area.  So everyone was at the Park to swim!  We were glad to be out of there by 10:00am. 

But the rest of this trip was amazing.  We traveled 3860 miles on this trip.  Illinois to Alabama to the Gulf coast of Florida, to Marco Island Florida, to the Atlantic side of Florida.  From there we traveled to Washington DC and then made our way home.  It was 16 days and lots of time in the car, but still really a great time. 

I guess I am spending time flashing back to 2010 vacation is because our vacation this year did not turn out exactly as I planned, and I still feel like I need a vacation!  Isn't it silly how we all seem to need these vacations?  I think it is because we don't have enough rest in our day to day life.  We don't celebrate the Sabbath rest.  Our weekends are so filled with all of the "stuff" that we need to get done, because our work week is so busy.  And just as I have discovered this week (and wrote about yesterday), we don't sit and wait in silence.   And now that I am without a job, this seems really silly.  I have plenty of time, but it is not the same as being away on a vacation.

So, while I still would like to have another vacation to look forward to, I will practice more waiting and more rest.  And deep breathe and relax.  All the while I will be remembering to turn my focus onto Jesus.  And yes, I will also be remembering the relaxing time paddling on that river. 

Jesus, thank you for all the ways you have provided for Ken and I over the past years.  Thank you for vacations and travel and kayaks and beaches and exploring.  Especially thank you for pictures and memories that can remind us of peace and rest.  Holy Spirit, remind us to stop and rest and turn our focus onto you.  Change our perspective to heavenly things!   Amen

Break in my routine.........

So this weekend is another break in my "routine"!  It is another scrapbooking weekend.  I was thinking this morning about how long I have been doing these get away times.  I finally had to check with Gwen and through a long discussion, decided that the first time I did one of these weekends was in May of 2009.  Ellie was just a wee baby and now she is 5.  That is a long time.  

Even though I have a scrapbook room at home, there is something about being together with friends and family and laughing and talking.  I know that I don't need this time away from my "life" nearly as much as these other gals.  They are all in the midst of childrearing and/or careers working long hours.  I am the "grandma" of the bunch and am so blessed to only be working around 35 hours a week.  None the less, I cherish these times.  Now, don't get me wrong, it is not easy to pack everything up, cart it to the car (and hope you can make it all fit), and then UNLOAD it and set it up.  Only to have to load it back in the car and then unpack it when you get home.  Today I was the first to arrive and set up.

I am enjoying the quiet room and the time to get these words on the page, since I know that I will not have time or energy to do so tonight.  And I was thinking about how wonderful it is that God planned for us all to have a day of rest.  We have just forgotten what that means.  Our weekends (or other days off if we have to work on the weekend) are so full of stuff to do, that we don't actually get any resting done.  The most important rest that we all need, is time to just be with Jesus.  For so many people in church work, this is the hardest kind of rest time to find.  Let's face it, all of the volunteers at church don't have a very restful day.  By the time that they are finished with their responsibilities, it is hard to squeeze out an hour or two for doing nothing at all.   And most of them have jobs and family things that need doing.  It is a good reminder for all of us to stop and evaluate our schedules.  Then we need to make sure and insert time on our calendars to just BE. 

 

I am so blessed.  I say this over and over.  One of the greatest wonders of doing this blog is how thankful and blessed that I feel as I share these words.  It is my hope and prayer that all who read this blog, will stop and think about their own stories.  Each and every one of us has moments of blessing and gratitude to be reflected on. 

 

The hardest part of blogging for me, is that I don't have the chance to hear your story, or hear of your blessings.  I would love to know what you feel about my words.  So I am asking for your feedback today.  How are you making space to just rest?  What blessings have you seen this week in your life?  Tell me about your joys and sorrows.  I would love to share with you. 

 

Jesus, thank you for this special time away and the blessing to rest.  Thank you for the energy and life that I receive from these wonderful gals this weekend.  Holy Spirit, bless our conversation and increase our creativity and productivity.  And please bring everyone here safely!   Jesus, thank you for all who take the time to read these words and consider the message behind the blog.  Encourage and strengthen them all.  Amen

Day Five - Thankful for my bed...........

So, I bet you can guess how I am feeling today, especially since the title of this post sort of gives it away.... yep, I AM TIRED!  I guess it has just been a very busy couple of weeks and tonight I feel like it is catching up to me.   I have had a couple of very challenging days at work, but this feels like more than just the last couple of days.  This is several weeks of being on the go.  Coupled with two intense conferences and a new job.  I had really hoped that my new job would be less stressful and more restful, but so far that has not been the case.   But I am just giving it some time.  However, tonight my body is just saying ENOUGH!   So I made my way to my bed at 6:30pm. While I haven't been asleep, I have been resting.  The good news is that I don't work until 10:30 tomorrow morning.  So I plan to have a lazy morning without rushing. 

 

At my new job, all of the kids rest from 12:30 to 3:00.  Now you would think that if all the kids were sleeping this would be a piece of cake!  But the truth of the situation is that not every kid goes to sleep and when they don't, it is very difficult.  Let me tell you that one screaming kid can wake a room full of sleeping friends.  And it is the policy of the center that all children remain on their cots during this rest time.  So, you can not hold a screaming child to quiet them down.  The option is to sit on the floor and pat or rub a back and hope that the child calms down and goes to sleep.  They firmly believe that all children can be trained to sleep.  What is already obvious to me, is that some children sleep and some don't.  And all that has been trained is the workers who follow the rules and hold kids down on cots.  In every room there is at least 1 or 2 children who never go to sleep.  So this "rest time" is not restful for the workers.  Additionally, all of the paperwork and planning and preparing happens during this time, as well as lunch breaks for the workers.  Makes you rethink "rest"time, doesn't it?

 

Today, to just add a little extra excitement to the day, a 23 month old child managed to pull the fire alarm - just as the children were getting ready to eat lunch.  And it was cold and rainy.  I had a momentary feeling of panic since I was not trained on the procedure for fire alarms.  I did the obvious thing.  Got the kids out of the building. So we were outside for about 20 minutes, in the cold with kids who were hungry and tired. After about 10 minutes, someone was able to get the coats for the kids.  However, they did not get the teachers coats!  That might be why I am still feeling chilled tonight. 

 

As I have been praying and keeping my eyes and ears on Jesus, there has been a couple of things that have become more clear to me.  First -  sometimes you just need to stop.

At the conference (okay, here I go again) a speaker said "When God pushes the pause button, you need to pause!"  So that is why I am in bed tonight.  Jesus made it clear to me that I need to rest.  He knows what I need!  I was thinking about those kids that never sleep during rest time.  I don't want to do that.  So, I will be resting tonight and taking advantage of extra sleep tomorrow morning.  Second - the fire alarm.  There are some things going on in my life right now and I have been hearing the sound of alarms.  Over the next couple of days I will be seeking additional revelation about these warnings.  I want to make sure that I am doing the right thing, even if the exact "procedure" is not clear to me right now. 

 

Jesus, thank you for the reminder that I need to rest.  I need to rest to recuperate from the last few weeks, but more than that, I need to rest to know how to handle the alarms I am hearing.  Thank you Holy Spirit for speaking to me and reminding me that you care for me and about my life.  Would you help others who might be feeling under the weather to PAUSE and rest?  And Jesus, help us to keep our eyes and ears on you and the amazing things you are speaking to us and showing us.   Amen

 

 

 

What happens when you don't ask.....

Since the oasis yesterday, I've been thinking about the ways that I find "rest".  I am so thankful that Jesus sometimes just brings me rest, even when I am not looking for it!  That was certainly true on Friday.  And the weekends are usually a time of rest for me - away from my job.  But yesterday did not really feel like "rest".  Here's what happened.  I saw some drapes advertised that seemed to be perfect for our living room.  We have two patio doors and it is difficult to find drapes that work well.  We need thermal insulation to help in the winter and we also need to be able to access the doors!  I used to have "Patio Panels" on those doors, but they have not been available recently. So, early on Saturday, we went to the store and purchased those drapes.  I settled for a darker color than I really wanted because they did not have the beige that I wanted in stock.  After getting the drapes home, I discovered that my current curtain roads would not work.  So, off we went to another store to purchase new curtain rods.  Once again, I am thankful that Ken could take down the old rods and get the new rods installed (I really don't understand those wall anchor things!)  So we then put up the first set of drapes.  As we stood back to look at them, it was clear that there was a problem!  First of all the left panel was at least 2" longer than the right panel.  And that same left panel also had an interesting "pattern" that showed up when the light came through the panel.  So, we decided this pair of drapes must just be defective.  Back into the car and another trip to the store to exchange the drapes.  I decided to go to a different location in the hopes that we could get the lighter color.  So, after some lengthy discussion, we were finally able to exchange both the "defective" pair and also the unopened pair for the beige color that I had originally wanted.  Success! Or so I thought.  Once at home, we opened the first package of beige drapes, put them on the rods, and guess what.  The right panel had the same weird pattern as the last set.  At this point we decided that these drapes were not worth the trouble.  We took down the panels AND the new rod.  Packaged up everything and realized that the entire day was gone.  NOT a day of rest.  Then, this morning, we went back to those stores and returned everything.   WOW!  The only good thing about the day was that I went on Amazon and actually found patio panels!  So they are on order and should be delivered next week.  Hopefully, we will be able to use our existing rods. 

For me, the ocean represents the ultimate rest place.  I don't know what it is about the ocean, but my whole body just relaxes when I get close to the ocean. (I am not helping my case to remain in the Chicago area when we retire!  Ken wants to move south and I want to stay close to the kids and grand kids.)  But I digress here.  Yesterday I did not rest, but today I am being more aware of my great need to rest.  So I have been spending most of today, letting myself rest. And while resting today, I was thinking about my "non-rest" of yesterday.  It was a picture of what my life is often like.  I run here and there, trying to get something that I THINK is exactly what I need.  I never stopped and asked Jesus if this was the right thing to purchase.  I mean, it was just some drapes for the living room, right?  But, had I stopped and let the Holy Spirit speak to me, I bet that I would have thought to check out Amazon BEFORE we ran back and forth and back and forth.  Today, I took the time to listen on even the little things, and it has been a much more restful day.  So my encouragement to all reading this blog today, is to remember to stop and ask the Holy Spirit for guidance, even on the little things.  It really does make for a more relaxed day. 

Jesus, thanks for the reminder that you have provided the guidance that we need through the presence of the Holy Spirit.  Thank you Holy Spirit that you are always willing to guide and direct us - even in the small things in our life.  What a wonderful gift this is. Thanks for the reminder that exactly what I needed for my living room was available on Amazon.   And Jesus, thank you for being so patient with me, as I am learning and re-learning to let you guide my entire life.  Help everyone reading this today, to be willing to ask for help in every decision.  Thank you for supernatural rest.  Amen

Endurance to rest

Over the last couple of days I have had more time than usual to think about and digest the
amazing words I heard on Friday.  And I am beginning to understand more about one of these words - Endurance to Rest!   Every time I go to a HUB meeting the verse "Be still and know that I am God" seems to come up.  Friday night, again - here was the the same message.   And the deeper message of having endurance to be still and rest and hear Yahweh. 

Guess what????  It is VERY HARD to be patient and have endurance to be still and rest.   When there are hours stretching out ahead of you, with no place to go and nothing pressing you need to do, you begin to grasp the meaning of endurance. 

Here is the Webster definition of endurance.......

ability to bear prolonged hardship: the ability or power to bear prolonged exertion, pain, or hardship

toleration of hardship: toleration of prolonged suffering or hardship

persistence over time: the survival or persistence of something despite the ravages of time

I love the idea of "ravages of time".   I realized that my "normal" is so busy, when I actually have a couple of free days, it feels like the ravages of time to me!  Isn't that sad?  And I know that I am not alone in this.   I am sure that if you asked 10 people in your life about being still for a couple of days, they would most likely discover the same thing.   It is difficult to simply be still.  

I want to take this one step further.  I don't want to just rest for the sake of resting.  I want to have the endurance to rest SO THAT I can receive all that Yahweh has for me.   That is where the endurance comes in.   It is the knowing that while resting, you need to have your hands, your heart and your spirit stretched out, to take in from Yahweh. 

Yahweh, help me to really rest, even despite the ravages of time.  I want to be a good receiver.  I am determined to be still, to rest and then to receive all that you have for me.  Thank you for this time out of my normal routine that you have provided for me.     Amen.