Comfort food from the past......

(This is my second attempt at writing this blog.  Suddenly, my screen went white and I lost the entire blog that I had written.  When I went back to the "saved" post, it was also blank!  UGHHH!  Very frustrating!  So I will begin again......)

I just got up from a wonderful Sunday dinner that was as filled with memories as it was with good food.  This meal was one that I could have eaten 50 years ago!  My mom made this often on a Sunday and I loved the smell of this meal cooking as much as the eating!  What is this great meal? Pot Roast, cooked with carrots in the juice, mashed potatoes and gravy.  Yep, simple comfort food.  Each bite tonight was a bit of good feelings from my past.  Isn't it funny how a meal can cause you to be flooded with memories?

While we were on our short get away last week, Ken had one of those great "memory meals".  I had no idea what this was when he ordered it, but he was so excited when he saw this on the menu....

We didn't think to get a picture of this when it was brought to the table, so what you have here is part of a "Pony Shoe"!  Yes, that's right - a "Pony shoe".  Also on the menu was a "Horseshoe".  Needless to say, I had never heard of this. If you are not from Central Illinois I will give you the actual definition of a "Horseshoe"....

The Horseshoe is an open faced sandwich originating in Springfield, Illinois.  It consists of two slices of toasted thick Texas Toast bread, two hamburger patties covered with french fries, and then covered with a "secret cheese sauce".   This can also be made with a fried pork patty, ham or fried chicken.  A Pony shoe is one piece of bread with one patty of meat, covered in the same fries and cheese sauce. 

Ken's food memory goes back about 30 years when he used to go to motorcycle races in Springfield each year.  Apparently he often ate a horseshoe or pony shoe while in Springfield.  It was fun to watch him savor this really unusual meal, while I ate a plain old hamburger!  

It's interesting how food can really bring those memories flooding back.  I don't have many foods that are memory filled but my meal tonight certainly was.  It's funny how times of missing my mom, just happen.  Tonight I understood the missing since this was one of her favorite meals also.  I can't imagine how many times she cooked that meal for her family.  Even in the last years when we visited her, she would make this meal.  Yes, special, special memories.  Comfort in spite of the missing.  

Earlier (before my screen when white and I lost my first blog post), I was thinking about another "Comfort Food" - Communion.  That special celebration meal always brings me that same memory filled experience that other comfort foods do.  Even the smell of the wine and the candles burning are reminders of that great meal to come.  That simple cup and bread bring the greatest comfort and peace of any food.  I love that Jesus knew that we would need a tangible thing to hold on to, to taste and to eat and drink.  I love these verses from Matthew 26:26-28

26 While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, “Take and eat; this is my body.” 

27 Then he took a cup, and when he had given thanks, he gave it to them, saying,“Drink from it, all of you. 

28 This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.

Every single Communion time is a time of comfort food.   And it is also comfort food filled with memories of all that Jesus accomplished on the cross for us.  Don't you just love that the Holy Spirit reminded me of Communion as I was thinking about my great dinner?

So a great Sunday dinner, followed by a pony shoe. Then memories of my mom and ended with some thoughts on Communion.  Not much better than that.   I am convinced that there is some reason that this blog really needs to be written.  I have found that the more difficult a post is to write, the more necessary it is for those that read them!  So for the second time........  here it is!

Jesus, thank you for all that you provide for us each day.  Thank you for food that fills our bodies with nutrients and fills our souls with comfort.  Holy Spirit, thank you for your gentle reminders that help us understand the great gift of Communion.  Jesus, bless everyone who reads these words with your comfort and peace.   Amen

Revelation from Dutch Sheets (from my small group today!)

What an amazing day I had today!  Wednesdays are always great because it is my "small group" day!  Oh how I love those wonderful ladies who set aside a couple of hours each week, to come together and hold each other up.  We laugh, we cry, we pray, we worship, we learn..... and so much more.  Today we listened to a Dutch Sheets CD from a recent conference in our area. (I missed the chance to attend this conference) I have read many of Dutch Sheet's books and heard him speak several times.  So a chance to hear a current message from him is a real treat.  We only listened to about 30 minutes but let me tell you, it was a power packed 30 minutes.

I want to just focus on one of the many thoughts from this short half hour teaching.....it is about the word "TESTIMONY".  Dutch said that a man approached him at the end of a conference and told him how much he enjoyed his teaching.  He was a Jewish believer in Jesus and a pastor.  Dutch went on to say that, from this man, he learned exactly what testimony means in Hebrew and more than that, what it means for us.  When we think about testimony, we think it is a remembrance.  We are remembering something that happened in the past.  But to the Jewish people it is much more than that.  There is an action - a doing - in the word testimony.  When there is a testimony - a remembering of something that God has done - than there is a present day DOING.  In the Old Testament the people were always recounting what God had done.  The reason they were doing this was so that God would do the same thing for them now!  When they needed a miracle, they recounted all the times that God had done miracles.  And then as they spoke that testimony, the power of God was released again for that miracle.  WOW!  I know that, at first reading, this may sound sort of......mundane.  But think about this!   I know that I had missed this.  I knew that testimony was important.  I knew that I have been encouraged and seen my faith grow through hearing the testimony of others.  But I also know that I had never imagined that part of the process of testimony was God actually doing that exact thing, NOW.    Think about all the prayers for healing that are prayed.  How much more powerful it is to give a testimony about a time that God healed.  As that testimony is spoken out, the power - the action - is released.  Dutch Sheets gave several examples of times when a speaker just told "stories" (testimonies) of the amazing things that God has done and then people responded as the power of God was poured out.

Think about Communion.  Think about the words that are spoken over every Communion meal.  It is a testimony.....a remembering...and speaking of the events of that meal.  And each time that we take part in the sharing of this testimony, we release the power of Jesus.  Those words that Jesus shared with His disciples become NOW words spoken to us and for us.  This just gives a further confirmation of the importance of the celebration of Communion and the words that are a part of that celebration.

There was even more in that 1/2 hour teaching.  But I know that I need more time to just meditate on this one point.  What an amazing blessing it is to learn something like this.  We seem to have lost so much when we do not understand the whole of the Bible from a Jewish perspective. Tonight I am so thankful for this teaching and for Dutch Sheets.  And I am thankful, again, for my small group.

Jesus, thank you for continuing to bring revelation to us, when we are missing an important truth.  Help us to change our thinking about testimonies.  Holy Spirit, give us courage and boldness to speak out all that Jesus has done.  Bless Dutch Sheets and the messages that he shares.  Continue to give him wisdom and expand his platform.  And Jesus, thank you for Communion!  Amen

Thinking about Communion today...........and another "Big Event"

Yes, here is a blast from the past.  I am the "girl in the glasses" - second from the right.  And the year is 1969.  This is my Confirmation and also my first Communion.  It was a very special day to me, although the process of Confirmation was NOT so great.  We had just moved to this area and none of these kids were my friends.  As a matter of fact, they were not very nice to me at all.  They had their own little group and they were not happy that I had burst onto the scene and joined them. I felt very much the outsider. Even down to those Bibles we are holding.  Each Bible had our name inscribed on the cover.  And mine had my name misspelled and the wrong middle name. Again, not so great. So in quite typical middle school fashion, this was not a very good year for me.  But I digress....

The church was a modern, very small sanctuary, that actually had metal folding chairs instead of pews.  I think it seated around 100 people.  The Pastor was not very memorable.  We had joined this church because it was a block from our house.  So there were no big family ties to this church.  But here's the thing, on that day... the day of my Confirmation and my first Communion, something amazing happened to me.  I had a very real encounter with Jesus.   Isn't that what we all want to believe about these events?  It is never supposed to be about the pastor, or the ritual and should always be focused on Jesus.  And on that day, in that small church, I understood the miracle of Communion.  No, this was NOT on Maundy Thursday.  In fact it was in October (and for all those Lutherans out there, it was not actually on Reformation either).  But since that day, Communion has had special meaning to me.

On to Maundy Thursday......there was one particular Maundy Thursday when my church had a family meal before the service.  There were many families there and lots of children.  My own kids were there...Doug was in late grade school and Gwen was early middle school.  During the service, before the time of Communion, the pastor called the entire congregation up to the altar.  Not just near the altar but actually right up to the altar.  And then he told the story of the Last Supper.  And we were all packed in, very close as we listened to the words of the story.  And then we celebrated Communion.  I remembered watching the kids.  And I felt that amazing wonder of the supernatural power of the presence of Jesus in those common elements of bread and wine.  An added bonus to that night was the little girl who announced that she had given her heart to Jesus at that packed altar.

I have always believed that it is wrong to withhold Communion from children who know Jesus.  I am not exactly sure how the church arrived at this tradition.  I felt so strongly about this that I prepared material to help kids in second and third grade prepare to receive Communion.  It was wonderful to see kids able to be empowered with the real presence of Jesus through this meal.  Why would we want to withhold this powerful gift of the life of Jesus from our children?

So that is my Communion "Big Event" story with a bit of a Confirmation story thrown in.  You know it is good to look back on these times.  It's good to remember the reason for Communion and the events of that Last Supper. And it is good to expect Jesus to be present every time we celebrate Communion.  This day is a gift.  It is a reminder that Jesus knew that we would all need to have a concrete way to touch and taste him.  Jesus left a physical way for us to have a spiritual encounter with him every time we participate in this meal.  Isn't that amazing?

Jesus, thank you for this week filled with "big event" days.  Thank you for understanding us so well that you prepared, in advance for this Communion meal.  Help us all to keep our focus on you as we take that walk with you into the Garden,  Give us grace to walk with you through the day tomorrow as we contemplate your great sacrifice for us.  Jesus you are the way, the truth and the life!  Amen

When you get exactly what you need from a little boy....

"Music is a higher revelation than all wisdom and philosophy.  

Music is the soil in which the Spirit lives,thinks and invents." 

 Ludwig van Beethoven

I was treated to a long "concert" on Tuesday when Zeke sat at the piano and "played" and sang for me for over 30 minutes.  He even used the pedals (which he is quite fascinated with).  He sang some brand new, never heard songs and he sang some songs that he knows from school and learned at home.  It was the most healing and freeing 30 minutes for me.  When I saw the quote above, I realized the truth it contained.  In the last couple of weeks, I have been searching for revelation.  And anyone who has SEARCHED for revelation will tell you, when you search, you do not find.   Revelation COMES to you.  And on Tuesday, it came to me as Zeke sat at that piano and sang.  

This search for direction, an almost frantic feeling thing, had taken on a life of its own.  Sitting on the couch and listening to Zeke sing words of life, well, it just set something free in my spirit.  All of the wondering and concern and uncertainty seemed to go.  Suddenly I felt light and free.

Today during my small group prayer time, I saw a tunnel.  But it was not a scary, dark place.  It felt safe and calm.  I knew that I could not get off track - I could not go right or left - I could only go forward.  All of the thoughts I had been entertaining about being in the wrong place, just vanished.  I saw that the tunnel was taking me through the mountain.  And It was clear that this was a much easier path than climbing up and over that high, looming peak.  I was going through the mountain in a tunnel of protection and safety, with a predetermined destination.  Not one that I had chosen, but one that was certainly my destiny.  How peaceful and calm I felt at that moment.  And it started while listening to Zeke, sing "Jesus Loves Me". 

It is really funny, when looking back at the last few weeks, I can see that it was getting harder and harder to put words on a page - harder to write this blog.  It was harder to tell myself the truth.  I felt as if I was never going to figure out why I wasn't finding what I was seeking!  And then the truth blasted into my spirit through a 3 year old, singing "Jesus loves me, this I know.  For the Bible tells me so.  Little ones to him belong, they are weak, but He is strong.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  The Bible tells me so."  Nothing else mattered.  Jesus loves me and that is simply enough.  And then the revelation comes after I simply rest in the TRUTH that JESUS LOVES ME! 

Today is Ash Wednesday.  That very holy day of remembering the sacrifice of Jesus for us.  As we took Communion together in my small group, I felt the freshness and power of the Spirit just rolling over me.  For the first time in many weeks, I knew that I was on the right track, heading toward the destiny that is mine alone.   There is something so powerful about being in a small group of friends and drawing near to Jesus.  It is indeed flowing into Jesus' life.  Again, a reminder of the power of the PRESENCE!  

On Tuesday morning I captured this shot of Anna and Zeke enjoying a snack together.  Anna is just mastering the snack cup.  I  loved that they wanted to sit together and share those goldfish and animal crackers.  I was thinking about this scene today during my communion time.  Yes, it is good to share with those closest to us.  I am so thankful for my small group.  These women hold me accountable.  They pray for me and with me.  The remind me of the truth when I forget.  And they celebrate the breakthroughs when they come.  

I am walking into the Lenten Season in a much different place. For me it will be a time of moving on, in that tunnel, with assurance and most of all, HOPE.  Yes, the return of HOPE!  And, even now, I am walking in new revelation and a new level of joy and peace.  Expect to hear much more of the revelations I am receiving!  More than that, expect to hear and see more of Jesus for yourself.  Take in those words of that simple song, Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so!  If you don't have a small group, I encourage you to find one!  Ask at your church.  Call a friend or two.  There is power and HOPE in being together and sharing Jesus.  Lent is a great time to consider this.  For some reading this blog, you may feel alone.  Jesus loves you, this I know!  For the Bible tells me so!

Jesus, thank you for your great care and love for us.  Thank you for revelations that bring us into places of peace and calm.  Thank you for children who know and share the truth with us, even in simple songs.  Holy Spirit, thank you for leading us and bringing us exactly what we need.  Jesus, thank you for Communion and the power of the PRESENCE that we receive.  Draw us together in you, Jesus.  Amen

Where my mind is today......found in a mystery box.

So last Saturday, Ken and I were doing some serious "clean out" of those sort of hidden places.  You know, the drawers and cupboards that you don't really look at much.  We had several large garbage bags of true junk, several bags of stuff to go to the kids and some things to go to Goodwill.  Later in the day, I was looking around in the master bedroom walk-in closet, looking for potential Goodwill donations and I saw a plastic storage box stuck way up on the top shelf of the closet organizer.  So I dug out the step stool, and pulled down the "mystery box".  This is what was in that box....

This is my wedding dress and veil.  From 1974.  It was not packed carefully away or "preserved".  It was literally stuffed in a plastic box.  And I really thought I had gotten rid of this years ago!  This was not a "designer wedding gown".  I know that I mentioned in a previous blog that I got this out of a bargain list and paid $19 for it.  I did buy the head piece and veil and actually paid more for them than the dress!  When I THOUGHT I got rid of it, I must have had some hesitation.  For some reason, I shoved it in a storage bin.  I am so thankful right now that I did that.  

I know that most likely no one else will ever want to wear this dress.  Gwen and Susie both have amazing wedding dresses that were professionally preserved in case one of their children wants to use them.  But I have a strong feeling that somewhere down the line, one of those grandchildren will be thankful that I saved this dress.  Not for the dress, but for the memories.  I have spent hours and hours preserving pictures of events, people and places.  And I am beginning to understand how important it is to have physical things to go along with the memories.  

I am so thankful that these two items have been preserved and they are now in Gwen's hands.  The top picture is the cedar chest that belonged to my grandmother, Nora Toensing.  My mom had this chest (along with her own cedar chest) and she gave it to me when she moved into her apartment.  I had this in my home for many years, and passed it on to Gwen when she got married.  Now it is particularly special since Lia's middle name is Nora and someday she may get this chest.  The ring is extremely special to me.  I remember my mom talking about this ring.....well ALWAYS!  This ring was her mothers wedding ring and it was given to my mom's sister Bea.  Aunt Bea had no children and when she died, my mom received all of her belongings.  Finally, my mom got this ring and really enjoyed it for several years.  She felt very strongly that I should have this ring and I knew I needed to pass it on to Gwen.  There is something very powerful in holding these objects that had belonged to my grandmother.  Especially important because we never really knew her.  I could see it in my mom's eyes when she looked at that ring and imagined her mother wearing it.  

So just like the very solid and clear footprints that I have been blogging about, sometimes it is good to have solid and firm objects to touch and hold.  I felt a flood of memories when I looked at my wedding dress and touched the fabric.  So many things came back to my mind.  And I was amazed at how very, very SMALL this dress was (I mean, really, was I that small, way back then???? I guess I was!).  

As I began to write this blog, I was filled with the thought of the Communion Table.  This might seem silly, but to me, these elements, the bread and wine  - real objects - that you can touch and taste so increase the meaning for me.  I love that Jesus used everyday objects to convey a special Spiritual message -  His very real presence for us.  And tonight, I am thankful for objects that are physical reminders of important "footprints" in my life.  Yes, this whole thought changes the way I view the things that I have saved.  And I think it will change how I decide WHAT I will save from here on out!   May need a few more storage boxes!  

Jesus, thank you for knowing us so well and providing connections for us through things that we can see, feel, touch and taste.  Holy Spirit, thank you for drawing me down the path to understand the importance of preserving not only memories in pictures, but also objects.  Thank you for yet another depth of understanding to the footprints on my spiritual path.  Amen

Spritz Cookies, my grandma and Communion.......

I had another really busy day today.  My weekend has been spent going from one task to the next.  But in the midst of that, it has been very "Christmas-y"!  Today in addition to the usual weekend stuff that needs doing (you know, things like groceries, laundry, cleaning), I managed to make some candy, one batch of my favorite Christmas cookies (more on these later), and I wrapped about 2/3 of my Christmas presents.  Not bad!  I've had a couple things on my mind today.  First of all, these Christmas Butter Cookies.  They are made with a cookie press and just melt in your mouth.  The recipe that I use was my Grandma Johnson's (my dad's mother).  It's very simple.  1 cup of butter (and it has to be REAL butter), 1/2 cup of sugar, 1 egg, 1 tsp of vanilla, and 1 tsp of almond extract.  The interesting thing about these cookies is that I don't really have many memories of these cookies when I was growing up.  My mom told me (when I was in high school) that her original cookie press had stopped working at some point, and she just never replaced it.  Then, my dad brought home a new cookie press.  Suddenly these cookies were made every Christmas! 

The problem that I have with these cookies is that I can eat them non-stop!  I just can't eat one and it doesn't end up with just two or three.  I love these cookies!!!!!  You only get about 50 small cookies and they have 1/2 pound of butter in them, so you know that they are rich.  Just let me say, you need to try out these cookies. 

 This is my Grandma Betty Johnson.  I'm not sure when this picture was taken but I am guessing sometime in the early 1950's.  My only real memory of her is visiting her at her house (which is near to Lake Maud).  She had a candy jar and always gave me a piece of candy.  And I remember that she had a kitten and she let me hold the kitten.  She died when I was 4 years old.  Today I was thinking about these cookies and wishing that I had known her when she was making these cookies.  I am so thankful that I have this recipe and that it has not been lost.  I have passed this recipe on to my daughter and my daughter-in-law so that our future generations can  continue to enjoy these amazing "Spritz Cookies" from Sweden.  So today my thoughts are on my own grandchildren.  I am more convinced of the importance of the little things that we can give to our family.  It is interesting that food is often a trigger to our memories. 

I can understand why Jesus decided to use food and a family meal to help us remember him.  I love that Communion is about remembering all that Jesus did for us.  I love that Jesus knew and understood how important gathering together around a meal is.  And I love that this amazing tradition of the Bible is something that I can pass on to my children and my grandchildren.  What an amazing blessing the Lord's Supper is to us. 

Jesus, thank you for food, fellowship and memories.  Thank you for the blessing of Communion.  Holy Spirit, thank you for using food to bring memories to our mind.   Thank you for Spritz Cookies, for Christmas and special treats. And Jesus, thank you for rest and time to enter into all of the fun of the season.   Amen

His Banner Over Me is Love!

Tuesday night in worship I saw a wonderful white banner flying overhead. (Think a large, long flag that was fluttering in the breeze).  On the banner were the words "Wholly Holy".   No, this isn't a typo - it said wholly, holy.  I knew that Yahweh's message was that he was and is and will be always - totally holy.  100%.  No part of Him that is not holy.  Isn't that amazing?  I was blown away by this.  I am so grateful that I often "see" these pictures, especially for this.  Because if I had heard this, it would have just been "Holy, Holy".  And I would have missed the entire message of the night.  Yahweh is totally, entirely holy.  While contemplating the depth of this picture, I began to hear the song "His Banner Over Me" and knew that this banner was His love.  During the remainder of our meeting I saw that banner flying over us.  It was a picture of the great love that IS Yahweh.  Then, as we celebrated Communion together, I saw that banner descend on all of us in that room and fill us with His love.  What a great night. 

Later, as I was seeing that banner over me and over my family, I had a clear picture of a baby being swaddled in a blanket.  As a grandma and nanny I know the effect a good tight swaddle can have on a fussy baby.   There is a great comfort for infants when they are held tightly.  Some babies can't relax and burp without being swaddled.  And the Lord reminded me that in these times of great shaking, He is swaddling His people in the blanket of His love.  Even when we feel as if we are being tossed around and swung back and forth, His love is holding us tightly. 

Thank you Yahweh for your pictures and revelations that bring me such peace.  Thank you for your wholly, holiness that is who you are. I am so blessed  to have your banner of love over me, around me and within me.  
                               His Banner Over Me Is Love
    The Lord is mine and I am His, His banner over me is love.
    The Lord is mine and I am His, His banner over me is love.
    The Lord is mine and I am His, His banner over me is love.
    His banner over me is love!

    He brought me to His banqueting table, His banner over me is love.
    He brought me to His banqueting table, His banner over me is love.
   He brought me to His banqueting table, His banner over me is love.
   His banner over me is love!

    He lifted me up into heavenly places, His banner over me is love.
    He lifted me up into heavenly places, His banner over me is love.
    He lifted me up into heavenly places, His banner over me is love.
    His banner over me is love!

    He is the vine and we are the branches, His banner over me is love.
    He is the vine and we are the branches, His banner over me is love.
    He is the vine and we are the branches,His banner over me is love.
    His banner over me is love!

    Jesus is the rock of my salvation, His banner over me is love.
    Jesus is the rock of my salvation,  His banner over me is love.
    Jesus is the rock of my salvation,His banner over me is love.
    His banner over me is love!
 
One additional, interesting thing.  Tuesday was also the day of "Abide In Me".  Everything seemed to be about the vine and the branches.  I did not remember until finding the lyrics for this blog, that the message of the vine and branches is part of this song also!  So I will continue to reflect on abiding in the vine, as well as on His banner of love!