A weekend of celebrations.....

Yesterday Ken and I took Doug and Susie out to dinner to celebrate Doug's birthday.  Doug got to decide where we would go to eat.  And his choice made us ALL happy.  We went to Uncle Bub's.  Ken first introduced me to this wonder BBQ place a few years ago.  He would go there with friends from work, for an occasional lunch.  When he mentioned it to Doug, it was no surprise that this was also a favorite spot for Doug and his friends.  It was so good to sit and eat together.  To talk and share and just be with each other.  And the food was simply amazing.  It was actually the first time that Susie had ever been there and she loved it.  We went home with take home boxes and Doug and Susie went with a bottle of BBQ sauce in their hands.  Back at our house, we sat and talked over some coffee.  It was a wonderful evening.

That is, except for the coffee.  It was not so smart for me to drink a cup of regular coffee at 7:30pm on the night that we LOSE an hour of sleep.  I didn't manage to go to sleep until well after midnight (which was 1:00am with the time change).  So it was a very early morning for me today...and it was actually later than I normally get up.  And we had another big day today.  

We went to Ellie's Hello Kitty party to celebrate her 6th birthday.  It was a wild and crazy party with many, many little girls (and boys) running around.  Gwen had 4 different craft areas (which is appropriate since Ellie is a CRAFTY girl!) to entertain the kids.  There were beads to string, sun catchers to paint, scratch off shapes, and pages to color.  There was a pinata and candy bar and cake (of course).  And there were presents.  Ellie got a large assortment of Hello Kitty items - everything from a beach towel and sprinkler to a bathrobe and headphones.  Of course there were some Frozen items thrown in and also Barbie.  What else does a girl need?  It was a huge success.  

Yesterday Ken and I went into Chicago to go to the zoo.  It was the first "warmish" day that we have had.  It was around 30, but clear and sunny.  I took this shot just as we were walking into the zoo.  I love the hint of a rainbow at the top of this photo, in the sun shining down.  When I downloaded my photos and saw this picture I was reminded of those banners that I saw flying over me.  The banner of Love and IS Jesus and also that banner of hope.  Yes, we are in the midst of warming temps and the snow melting away.  Spring seems to be nearer and the cold darkness of winter seems to be retreating.  And then there are these reminders of all that is right around the corner.  I feel an increasing excitement and certainty that all of the promises and words that have been declared are bursting forth.  Yes, this is a time of the new springing up.  How amazing!

Jesus, thank you for sunshine and warm temperatures, for birthdays and family and noisy little girls and boys.  Thank you for BBQ and cake and time to just enjoy each other.  Thank you for speaking to me in rainbows and clear skies.  Holy Spirit, stir up all of those seeds sown so long ago and remind us all that this is a season of double blessings and new things coming forth.  Jesus, thank you for knowing exactly what we need.  Amen

Double Blessing Day!

Today is a special day for our family.  Today is Doug's birthday and it is also Ellie's birthday!  The top picture is Gwen and I with sweet Ellie in 2009.  Yes, she is 6 years old today!  And the bottom picture is Gwen and Doug in 1982 on the day that we brought Doug home from the hospital.  He is 33 today. This was long before siblings were allowed to actually touch the baby in the hospital.  Gwen was so excited to hold her brother.

We just never imagined that we would have shared birthdays.  As a matter of fact our family had a get together the weekend before Doug's birthday in 2009 and Doug actually told Gwen not to have the baby on his birthday.  We all laughed about this since his birthday was 4 weeks before her due date.  She assured him that she would not hit his birthday.  But, low and behold, Ellie decided to make her appearance on March 6 at 4:30am.  So, indeed, this is a double special day for us.

Today I spent some time running a bunch of small errands.  I think I made 6 stops in a bit over an hour.  I made a couple of returns, bought a couple of gifts, stopped at couple of stores but didn't find what I was looking for, and went grocery shopping.  I noticed that I felt an extra bounce in my step and had a smile on my face.  Nothing like a couple of birthdays to lift your spirits!  Tomorrow Ken and I are taking Doug and Susie out to dinner to celebrate his special day.  And on Sunday, Ellie is having a "Hello Kitty" birthday party.  It will be quite a weekend.

I kind of did a double take when I typed the title of this blog post.  Double Blessing.  I have been holding on to the word that 2015 is a Double Blessing year.  Today, it is especially easy to hold on to that hope.  Yesterday Doug stopped by after work to help Ken bring a very large and very heavy cabinet up to his new photo studio room.  (My back thanks Doug very much!)  It was so good to chat with Doug.  I am so thankful for him and the amazing man that he is.  On Tuesday, Ellie was talking about her upcoming birthday party.  I loved the big smile on her face when I told her I would be there!  I am so thankful for her caring and loving heart.  I can't wait to see what amazing, creative, artistic things she accomplishes in her life!   Yes, a day like today is evidence of the double blessings promised for this year.  I loved this post on Elijah list in January from Curt Landry - just click on the this link - The Double Portion in 2015.  This is just one of the many, many words about this year.  It is a time of great expectation of what Jesus is doing in us and through us this year.

It was really, really cold again today as I was out doing those errands.  The wind was blowing and the temperature was in the low teens.  So the windchill was well below zero.  I really didn't notice the cold until I had a cart full of food to load (and unload) from my trunk.  By the time I had gotten everything into the house I noticed that I had lost that spring from my step and didn't feel a bit like smiling.  But then I remembered this day and the double blessing.  I was able to shake off that bit of a funk from the cold weather and felt that joy returning to my spirit.  When I happened to glance out the window, the sun was shining on the snow and ice and there was a hint of a rainbow in the reflection on the snow.  It was so beautiful!  I suddenly had a flash of that really large HOPE banner sailing over me and then all was right with my world.

This has been a good start to the weekend for me.  And all of this double blessing and all of the joy and every bit of that hope is right there for you also!  No matter how cold or dark or sad your day might be, Jesus is there to turn things around for you.  There is DOUBLE to go around!

Jesus, thank you so much for Doug and for Ellie on their special day.  Thank you for knowing exactly what I would need as I looked out of the window today.  Holy Spirit would you share some of this hope with everyone who reads this blog?  Let them see and know that banner of hope is flying over them!  Thank you for joy that takes you by surprise.   Amen

When you feel like you ended up in exactly the correct spot....

On my current Nanny job, the little girl usually takes good naps.  This gives me several hours of each day with not much to do.  On Monday I was scanning the floor to ceiling bookshelves in the "playroom" (which obviously was an office at one time) and I saw this book.  It is a weighty tome about 3" thick.  It contained some amazing pictures of the Chicago fire and also some photos from before the fire.  As I was paging through, I realized that this was a true encyclopedia with  entries for most of the towns around me.  So I searched for my town.  And there it was.

Now I don't expect you to actually be able to read the little tiny text.  I enjoyed the entire entry, but the reason this was so interesting for me was one paragraph.... The last full paragraph on the page.   It seems that my town was a "quiet vacation spot" from city life.   And then the last sentence of that paragraph...."Montgomery Ward established a vacation home for employees in 1918".  This was so interesting to me since my dad was an employee of Montgomery Ward for 43 years!   I actually moved to Illinois when my dad was transferred here (actually the last of many times Wards moved my family during those 43 years).  When Ken and I purchased our home, my dad was quite interested in the "country" town that we selected.  And 37 years ago, this was a small country town.  We had horses stabled across the creek behind our house and several people raised chickens.  It was certainly not a typical suburban town.  My dad loved the small town hardware store in town.  It was the kind of place that had so much "junk" (which my dad would just say was great stuff) and boxes on the shelves that might have been there for years and years.  There were also people who worked in that store that could understand exactly what you needed when you came with a plumbing problem, or needed a certain kind of screw.  My dad spent many hours just "looking" in that store.  And he really liked our house.  So I found it interesting that this was a vacation spot for Montgomery Ward employees.  Yes, things have changed in the 37 years that we have been here.  The horses are gone, and so are the chickens.  The growth of the town has been something.  The population when we moved here was 4,000 and I believe that our current population is 13,300.  That wonderful Hardware store is now an Ace Hardware and has moved into a shopping center.  Not the same at all.  But I remember the first time that Ken and I came out here to look at the model homes.  First of all, it seemed so far away from everything that we knew.  But we were getting tired of the traffic and congestion that surrounded us nearer to the city.  I remember feeling "settled" when we moved here.  I can't really explain why seeing this one sentence in this book brought me down this path, but here I am.  

Over the last couple of months I have been doing a lot of thinking about where I am going, but here is another reminder that I seem to be in exactly the right place.  Today I had an amazing vision during my worship time.  I saw a very large angel towering over our house.  He was holding a large banner that said "HOPE".  And the word that I heard was that I have somehow let go of the hope that was in my spirit after Lucas died.  The message was clear.  Because I could not hold on to hope, Jesus has sent a ministering angel to me, that is holding up that banner of hope for me and my family.  And more than that, HIS banner over me is LOVE.  Jesus is a banner of love over us all.  So in the last week I have been in a tunnel of safety, there has been a river of life flowing through that tunnel and I am floating on towards that destination, AND there is a banner of hope and love flying over me.  WOW!  This has been a wonderful week that includes this reminder that I am exactly where I was supposed to be.  Yes, this gives me reason to breathe out and rest.  The good news is that this banner of hope is flying over all of us.  Right now there is so much fear and uncertainty in our world.  There is tension that fills the airways and you can't miss it no where you look.  We all need to know that even when we can't seem to hope, there is hope rising over us.  And more than that, Jesus is the banner of love that covers us all.  He IS the peace that fills us.  So if you can identify with my struggles over the last few months, if you are feeling hopeless and fearful, close your eyes and imagine that banner of hope sailing above you.  Bask in the banner of love and just rest.  

Jesus, thank you for such a great week.  I love that you give us exactly what we need and you know how to speak so that we will listen.  Holy Spirit, thank you for the peace that passes understanding.  Thank you for flying that banner of hope when I couldn't hold on to hope.  And Jesus, thank you for being that banner of love.  Amen

Message from the past....

Yesterday Ken and I discovered this.  At first glance you might wonder, "What in the heck is that?"
Well, this was the shelf in the closet in one of our bedrooms.  Our house is on "lot 13" in our subdivision.  And while I see the word "JOY" pretty clearly, I actually think it says J O 4.  Most likely a code for the placement of that shelf.  I remember that some people told us that we should not choose this particular house because it was LOT 13 and might be bad luck.  Since I didn't believe in luck, this really made no difference to me. And I know that even if that word didn't start off as "joy", the message is clear.  There has been great joy in this house!

That bedroom and that shelf have seen lots of changes in 37 years.  It started out as our guest room.  My mom and dad spent many nights in that room and we also had friends visit from out of state and stay in that room.  Gwen moved into that room as her first "big girl" bedroom.

 It was her room for many years until she went to college.  Then it became Doug's room. That shelf showed a bit of Doug's creativity as it was notched to allow for cables to run into the attic.  Doug stayed in that room until his early 20's when he moved out to live with friends.  For several years that room was a sort of "guest room".  We didn't really have it set up as such, but it often held an inflatable bed or two when it was needed.  Now it is becoming Ken's photo studio.  Another transformation is taking place.  And in all of the changes there has been JOY.

It seems funny to be talking about joy after months of sorrow.  I am grateful for the reminders of all of the joy that Jesus has sown into our home and our family.  This is one of those times that I have felt that "wake up call".  It is so easy to get bogged down in the very real sadness and forget about the wonderful blessings that are in our family.  I would like to say that I feel that joy, but it might be a bit soon. I can hope for joy.  But I am reminding myself that there is JOY and I am also speaking joy into my spirit.  And sometimes that is enough.

Isn't it interesting that we CAN speak into our spirits and remind ourselves of the truth?  I love that David had to do this in the Psalms.  He reminded himself to "Bless the Lord, o my soul".  So I feel quite okay with saying "Remember the joy, o my spirit"!  And there is power in the things that we speak into ourselves.  Power in the words that we say, even silently, about who we are and what the truth is in our situations.  A few years ago a friend of mine made up a list of all the positive characteristics of Jesus that she possessed.  Each day she would speak those things out loud as she looked in a mirror.  Things like "I am a child of the King".  "My Father in heaven loves me".  "Jesus will never leave me."  "I have the mind of Christ".  I think that I will begin a list right now!

Jesus, thank you for using everything to speak into us....even an old shelf from a closet.  Holy Spirit, remind us all to speak words of truth into our own spirits.  Help us to hold on to these truths even in the midst of dark and sad times. Give us wisdom to know exactly what we need to be speaking to ourselves.  Help us craft exactly the correct list that we each need to help us hold on to truth.  Jesus, thank you for the years of joy you have given to our family.  Amen

You will never walk alone!

Tonight on Facebook, I saw the following post from Faith Walters entitled "Walking Toward Your Destiny".  I have certainly heard words similar to this one, but it really hit me tonight.  Isn't it interesting when you look back at something and realize that you were being taken along a path that you didn't even see?  I'll explain more after you read this amazing word.....

FAITH WALTERS: WALKING TOWARD YOUR DESTINY
Sent via Kathie Walters Ministries:
I had a dream a while ago. In the dream I was walking in the stormy rain. I was talking on the phone and there was an atmosphere around me of, "Why would you go out in this kind of weather?" As I continued to walk, I didn't seem to mind the rain or the storm. Then I stated to someone on the other end of the phone, "I may be in the rain and I may be getting wet, but at least I'm gonna get to m...y destination.”

Things around us may be messy, dirty, wet, hard work and maybe not as pleasant as we would like it sometimes but, if we are on our way to our destination than those things are just small inconveniences compared to the end result. This is like bumps in the road, but there is a road!
Keeping your eye on the prize, your goals, your dreams, your destinations, will help you go through those difficult moments along the way.
We can begin to see our journey as an adventure instead of a trial. Instead of focusing on the immediate surroundings and becoming worn out or discontented, put your attention on the destination - that place you are walking towards, that goal you will achieve.
Suddenly those difficult things can seem not so difficult after all; not so wearing, not so disheartening. They are all a part of the great and wonderful journey, and they are small things in light of the big dream God gives you.
We were never promised things would be 100% easy and perfect all the time, but we were promised His wonderful grace to walk down our road. We can have joy in the midst of sorrow, have hope in the midst of despair, have faith in the midst of a trial and love in the midst of fear. Our circumstances do not need to dictate our lives… but our lives can dictate our circumstances.
Keep you eyes on your dream and your heart on your destiny.
This song is for you, so make sure and listen - lyrics from, “You’ll Never Walk Alone”: "When you walk through a storm, hold you head up high and don't be afraid of the dark, at the end of the storm is a golden light and the sweet silver song of a lark…” The spiritual meaning of a Lark is “Daybreak." How about that!  

Okay... now here is the link for the song that she is talking about in this post, "You''ll Never Walk Alone".   Take a moment and listen to the song.

This is the program from my wedding almost 41 years ago.  Take a look at the first solo.   Yep, that's right, "You'll Never Walk Alone".  I love that there is a Spiritual message in this song and at the time, I sure didn't realize that.  I also noticed tonight the wonderful words that were on the back side of our program for our wedding.  I can tell that Jesus had a plan and destiny for us, even when we didn't know it or acknowledge it.  For me. tonight. this brings such a warm feeling.  I love that I can look back...almost 41 years.... and see how Jesus was such a part of giving my life direction.  

Yes, I can rest even more deeply, as I am riding along on that river, in a tunnel, knowing that Jesus is in charge.  Isn't it wonderful how the Holy Spirit comes along and reveals this post on Facebook so that I can be reminded of the care and concern Jesus has always had for me.  I am so thankful for "Hindsight" that brings me peace and rest.  And I am glad for the reminder that daybreak is coming!  So there is an end to that tunnel.  The end is the destiny and plan that Jesus has for me.

If you feel like you are walking alone in that storm, or like me you feel like you are in a dark tunnel, hold fast to the words of this song.  There is a golden light right there with you.  That light is Jesus.  He will never leave you or forsake you.  So walk on....

Jesus, thank you so much for helping me to see and understand so much more clearly, exactly where I am right now.  Holy Spirit, thank you for the reminders and the memories that reveal that bring so much peace and rest into my spirit.  Thank you for Faith Walters and this word tonight.  Bless her and the ministry that you have given to her.  Comfort all those who are in that storm, facing dark rain and uncertain times.  Give them assurance that you are there with them.  Thank you for your great love.  Amen

Welcome to the river, come drink, come wade......

Today Gwen told me to listen to this song,  The River by Meredith Andrews.  The song is really good (you can click on the link above to listen to it), but take a moment and also focus on the lyrics.....

Everyone is broken  And in need of a Saviour

So He came and was broken For the mocker, for the shamed

Still our eyes are blinded By the culture, by the lies

We can’t see that we’re filthy We’re fallen and so dry

But He invites us Can you hear Him say?

He invites us  Hear Him call your name

Welcome to the river Come drink, come wade

Come find your very life Welcome to the river of God

Where your brokenness Is washed away

Everywhere is the sorrow And the pain of empty living

You can see it; look in their eyes.All the hopelessness of the world

But look closer, He is right there In the midst of every fear

Living water is the offer Restoration is the call

And He invites us Can you hear Him say?

He invites us Hear Him call your name

Welcome to the river Come drink, come wade

Come find your very life Welcome to the river of God

Where your brokenness Is washed away

Find your healing Find your freedom

In the river of God Your healing here

Your freedom there In the river of God

Welcome to the river Come drink, come wade

Come find your very life Welcome to the river of God

Where your brokenness Is washed away

Welcome to the river Come drink, come wade

Come find your very life Welcome to the river of God

Where your brokenness Is washed away

Yes, WOW!  There is so much in this song....I think I just got kind of stuck on the third line.. still our eyes are blinded by the culture, by the lies.    I sort of flashed back on so many ways that I was blinded at different times.  Sometimes the lies that I believed were just small things, but some times it was really big stuff.  Lets face it, our culture is STRONG and it is oh so easy to get blinded and miss just how wrong and unGodly something might be.  And sometimes we are blinded by thinking that "tolerance" is the answer.  Whatever someone wants to believe is okay.  When we think this way we miss the chance to share this invitation with others.  Jesus is calling ALL to come and drink and wade in that river of His life.  There are so many living with sorrow and hopelessness. There is so much brokenness.  And there is so much fear.  The answer is right here in this song....Welcome to the river of God!  Living water is the offer..Restoration is the call!  Isn't that amazing?  

I just love how Jesus leads you along, step by step.  Even when you feel like you have no idea where your are going!  I felt like I was just wandering and wondering where I was headed.  And then there was the tunnel.  Suddenly I knew that I was exactly where Jesus wanted me to be and more than that He was making sure that I get to that destination.... the destiny he has for me.  Today he is reminding me that there is a very fast flowing river in that tunnel.....a river of living water.  I have been invited to jump into that river and take a long drink.  A few weeks ago I was riding the "lazy river" at the waterpark with my family.  Today I know that I am on a totally different kind of trip.  I am sailing along on the river of living water, enclosed in my tunnel, headed in exactly the right direction.  It is quite the trip!  Welcome to the river of God!  Come on in, the water is fine!

Jesus, thank you so much for music that speaks so clearly and helps us to hear exactly what you are saying to us.  Thank you for reminding us all that there is total healing and restoration in the flow of that living water.  Jesus help us to boldly share your invitation and the great news of freedom and healing with our hurting world.  Holy Spirit, give us grace and courage as we ride your river.  Amen

Seeds sown in the generations.....

When I got to Gwen's house on Tuesday morning, the first thing that Zeke asked me was "Where are your Grandpas?"   Now this was a strange question.  So I tried to do some investigation to find out if he possibly was talking about HIS grandpa (Ken).  But, no, he was quite sure he wanted to know about MY Grandpas.  I don't know where this question came from, but Zeke really wanted an answer.  So I told him that both of my Grandpas had died.  Then he asked about my mom and dad.  I told him that they had both died also.  He stopped for a moment and then said "Are they in heaven with Jesus?"  When I answered yes, he smiled and said, "Okay, that's good."  And that was that.

Accept that I could not get this conversation out of my mind all week.  And then tonight I found this picture.  On the right is my "Grandpa Johnson" (my dad's father) and on the right is my "Grandpa Toensing" (my mom's father).  Included in the picture are my sister Karen and brother Jerry.  This photo was taken when my dads parents visited just before he went into the Navy in WWII.  My mom had moved back home with her dad and aunt since my father was shipping out.  I believe that  this might be the only photo of these two men together.  It was taken in 1943.  Shortly after my father returned from the war, in early 1946, my Grandpa Johnson died.  This was years before I was born.  Yet, this week I have been thinking about him and piecing together bits about him that I have heard over the years.  Here are a few things that I know about him...

1.  He came to the United States as an indentured servant from Sweden and worked on a farm as a farmhand.  He met my Grandmother (who had also come from Sweden as an indentured servant) in the United States and actually completed her term of indenture so that they could get married.
2.  He had a farm and really believed that farming was the only valuable way to make a living.
3.  He did not want my dad to go high school (he didn't think it was necessary) and he really did not want my dad to go to work with Electronics (radios and other new inventions).
4.  He spoke very little English and only read the Swedish newspaper.  He was not happy that my mom could not speak anything except English!  (He felt that if she was Norwegian and German, at least she should be able to speak one of those languages)

I can't help but feel that I missed out on so much because I never really knew my grandpas.  I so wish that I had gotten to know these two men.

This is Ken and Zeke last weekend at the waterpark.  I think that being with his grandpa is what brought the thought to Zeke about my grandpas!  It was so fun to see Ken with the grandchildren.  I love that Ken and I have the chance to really sow into our kids and grandchildren.  We are blessed to be able to see them often and spend time with them.  And I love that I get to have conversations with each of them that remind me of this special relationship.  Just like this conversation with Zeke about grandpas.  Later in the morning, Anna was sleeping and Zeke was sitting next to me.  I asked him to tell me about his grandpas.  He smiled and then started to tell me about "Papa" (Tim's dad) and "Grandpa" (Ken).  He told me that Papa played ball with him.  And that he took naps on the couch.  He told me that Grandpa laughed a lot and went in the lazy river with him. Also Grandpa has a car just like daddy's (not really, but close) and that Papa has a BIG van!  Isn't it interesting that at 3 he is already noticing what car they drive???  Boys!!!!  He talked for some time about each grandpa and it was so fun to listen to him.

And then, just a bit later that day, Zeke played and sang to me (which I already blogged!).  I am so thankful for the chance that I have to not only give to my grandchildren, but also to receive from them.  Yes, I missed out on many things because I didn't have my grandparents in my life.  But they both sowed seeds into my father and mother that were then planted into my life.  The most important seed is the one that assures me that they are together in heaven with Jesus.  What a precious gift it is to know that my Christian faith is part of my lineage.  And I love that I can see those seeds growing in my grandchildren.

So follow my lead today.  Take a moment and look back.  Look at your grandparents and see the things that have been planted in your family tree.  Look at your family now and see the evidence of things that you are banking for the future.

Jesus,  thank you for reminding me that your plan is for each generation to sow into the next.  It is an honor and privilege to be able to have an impact on the future.  Thank you for my generations and all that you have given to me through them.  Family is such an amazing gift!  Help us all to look deeper into our generations to see and appreciate each leaf on our family tree.  Amen