Moments captured in clay....

I've been thinking about Lucas - and Doug and Susie - more than usual these last weeks, since October is pregnancy and infant loss awareness month. All you have to do is be on Social Media a short time and you will see dozens of stories of families impacted by this.   It seems everyone either personally or in their immediate family has had a loss.  Or they have friends or coworkers that have been touched by this tragedy.  Trust me, this is a club no one ever wants to join. When I was a just married young adult, we never heard about anyone losing babies.  It was a subject not shared or talked about.  How much better it is that now these families don't have to endure this loss alone.  

We are  coming up to Lucas' birthday on November 1st.  It is hard to believe that he would be four years old.  The years have slipped by but Lucas remains so much a part of our family.

Every time I am at Doug and Susie's house watching Grace, I pass by this shadow box, hanging in the stairwell of their home.  Each time I glance at it, I am taken back to some of the hardest, darkest moments I think I have ever experienced.  Those white very faint hand and foot prints in the middle of this frame are from Lucas Jacob.  And they remind me of one of those phone calls you never think you will ever make.  But then when the situation arises, you make that phone call.  Actually, this was just one of those calls in the long list of calls that must be made. 

Lucas was only 10 days old when he died.  Doug and Susie's house were filled with flowers, cards and gifts from his birth.  There were stacks of baby items from the showers that had not even been opened.  Among those items was a frame and clay packages to make foot prints of your baby.  Not something that you would have done in the first 10 days with a newborn.  When I looked at that package I knew that I needed to make that phone call.  So I took that package and called the funeral home and asked them to preserve these pressed in clay memories of Lucas for Doug and Susie.  I know that I didn't imagine the importance of that call.  Even today I can remember the kindness of the funeral director who greeted me when I brought the package over.  Everyone was so gracious and willing to complete this task for me.  What a blessing they were in this difficult time.

Susie completed this frame after Lucas' first birthday.  Those hand prints of Lia, Ellie, Zeke and Anna were made for that occasion.  It is such a fitting place for those small faint hand and footprints.  Lucas is surrounded by his cousins.  They are holding on to his memory.  Lucas will not be forgotten.  Lia, Ellie, Zeke and Anna have a part in bringing Lucas into the future along with our family.  They will help to share memories and stories of Lucas with Grace.  There is nothing better than seeing these cousins, loving being together. 

So this month is a bit bittersweet.  There is certainly remembering and sadness.  But there is also so much gratitude and joy.  I am thankful for Lucas and his place in our family.  I know that God has a destiny for our family and Lucas has a place in that destiny.  Even though we may not understand and still be filled with "why" questions, one thing is certain.  Jesus loves us all. No matter what the situation, no matter what the tragedy, nothing - not even death- can erase the love.  We can walk on, growing and changing, leaving a legacy of love in our footprints, holding memories in our hearts and sharing them in the years ahead.

Jesus, thank you for your great love for us.  Holy Spirit, help us to love even the most unlovable around us.  Keep us mindful of those that may need a helping hand today.  Jesus, touch those who have experienced the loss of a pregnancy or infant or child. Thank you for family and friends who surround us with love.  Amen

From the smallest things to the biggest - through the eyes of children.

Earlier this week, Gwen and kids came to our house so that we could visit the Morton Arboretum to see a really fun exhibit of giant trolls.  The day BEFORE our planned trip was 80 and sunny.  Sadly, the summer like weather ended overnight and the day we visited it was in the 60's, breezy but at least the sun was shining.  Here is yet another perk of home school - you can visit amazing places during the week when they are not so crowded!   We had such a great time walking through the woods, finding all six of these amazing giant trolls.  Along the way, we saw many squirrels collecting nuts and acorns for the winter months, many birds and also saw scarecrows created by area children.  Watching those squirrels I couldn't help but think of our own little Gracie, who spent hours over the last weeks collecting acorns from the oak trees in Doug and Susie's yard.

The kids favorite scarecrow was this smore's creation that featured a really neat fire.  Ellie was especially interested in these scarecrows since she just joined girl scouts last week!  I see many hours of creative fun ahead for her.

There is something so refreshing about being outside, walking through the woods.  It was a perfect day for it.  We ended our day at Ken's favorite Pizza place.  He had a wonderful time showing the kids around the arboretum.  It was good food for the soul.

I was thinking about the contrast of those little acorns and those GIANT trolls!  Isn't it interesting how so many of our problems seem like those really big giant things?   Usually, it is fairly simple to see that most of those problems - no all of those problems - are no big deal to God.  I love that at the same time I have been looking at those little acorns.  It always amazes me that those big giant Oak trees grew from that little acorn.  What an interesting picture of the importance of sowing seeds into good soil.  Most of those acorns end up just getting eaten by the wildlife or they rot on the top of the ground.  It takes good black dirt and lots of water to cause that acorn to sprout.  And then the weather has to cooperate for it to be favorable for a tree to begin to grow.  

I had an interesting discussion with Ellie, Zeke and Anna today.  They are thinking a lot about giants since their visit to the trolls.  At first they didn't think that giants were real!  But then we talked about David and Goliath.  I reminded them that David was just a little boy when he went to fight the giant.  He was not worried because he knew that God would always be with him.  Plus he had a great idea to use the things that he knew he was good at!  His sling and a stone.  So we got to talk about all the things that each of them are good at and how God might use those talents.  I love when you can link a good biblical lesson with current events!

While doing my homework for my Bible Study, we had to make a list of my talents and how I use them to glorify God.  It was far more difficult than it should have been.   It is always much easier to see the gifts and talents of others rather than your own.  So my challenge this week is to look for those small talents that God can use to accomplish those impossible things.  Each of us has the ability to be kind and to offer a smile to those around us.  With all the nasty stuff floating around these days, that is one small talent that I plan to use more often.  How many "giants" can we bring down with a kind word and a smile?  

Jesus, thank you for the wonder and curiosity of children.  Help us all to consider Your Kingdom through the eyes of children.  Thank you for big trees and small acorns.  Holy Spirit, remind us all to step into the challenge to bring down the giants of fear, hate and anger in our world through kind words and a smile.   Thank you Jesus for blue sky and white clouds and sunshine.  Amen