What a busy month it has been....

Sometimes it is hard to just stop and look back on the past few weeks since there was just so much that happened!  You would think that, at my age, I would be mostly just relaxing in my Lazy Boy (which to be fair, I do quite often.)  But here is me being very grateful and feeling very blessed to be able to be so busy.  If Covid has done one thing, it has made everyone appreciate times of being out and doing fun things together.  And while this busyness does make it hard to find time to put my thoughts and feelings down "on paper" (so to speak) in this blog, I don't want a whole month to go by without recapping it.  So, here goes.

Being at Tim and Gwen's house is always like being at some very wonderful, nature area.   There is this incredible view from the family room (which has a huge picture window) or from the sunroom of the sprawling forest behind the home.  On this day, a very large hawk decided to land on the kids trampoline net!  It was really big and surveyed the grounds for a number of minutes.  It was shocking to see just how big it was when it actually took flight.  Watching the trees begin to change color and the leaves begin to fall, helped me mark the change of season.  It is so good to just stop and breathe out every time I am there.  

The very next day, I was at Doug and Susie's house and there was a really big thunder storm that moved through the area.  Of course this brought a day inside for Grace, James and me.  But just as I was leaving for home, the sun came out and I saw this really incredible rainbow over their house.  I turned around and went back inside to bring Grace out to see the rainbow.  It was still raining slightly, and I managed to snap this one not so good picture.  Grace was so excited since this was the first time she had ever seen a "real rainbow"!  It is so wonderful to be able to be a part of an experience like this.  These small firsts with any child are so special.  

A few days after this, I spent the weekend with Zeke and Anna (and Chandler) while Gwen and Tim, along with Lia and Ellie, were away at their Youth Fall Retreat.  As the kids get older and older, I have fewer and fewer of them during these retreats.  Starting next spring, I will just have Anna since Zeke will be gone also.  

The highlight for the kids was for sure the various playgrounds we visited.  We played some games, did some crafts and helped clean up all of the water toys for the winter.  Anna even painted my nails.  For me, the best thing was having breakfast out and then visiting the lake across the street.  The kids threw rocks in the water and tried to find skipping stones.  I was able to skip a couple and it sure brought me back to my own childhood at the lake.  I just treasure these simple times with the kids. 

The next week, I finally delivered on a birthday present for Ellie from last March.  Gwen and I took her to see Hamilton on stage in Milwaukee.  

It was the first time that Ellie had been to a live show and Hamilton is her all time favorite.  Again, getting to be a part of these "firsts" is just so amazing.  We had such a wonderful time, made even more wonderful after the Covid delay.  It actually felt "normal" to be sitting in a large auditorium.  I realized on the way home, this was the first time I have been out of Illinois since September of 2019!  For the last two years, I have never left home.  With all of the traveling that Ken and I did, it is no wonder that I am feeling sort of stir crazy.  Such a nice day and way to mark a milestone for Ellie.

Just a few days later, was an opportunity to watch Tim run a marathon and Gwen run a half marathon.  It was a simply gorgeous fall day, crisp and cool but sunny and dry.  

Tim's race started an hour before Gwen's so we were there bright and early.  I stayed with the kids and we became a "cheering section" on the path as the runners came by.  There was a large group of people from their church that also ran with them.  We had lots of runners to cheer for!  

Thankfully, everyone finished the race!  It was so fun to watch the group, some who were getting their first ever medals!  This was Gwen's 6th half marathon and Tim's 11th marathon.  I am so proud of their dedication and follow through.  I love being an eye witness to these important events.

Being able to spend time each week with Grace and James has been a joy.  James seems to change and grow overnight.  So it is a blessing to be able to watch each new accomplishment.   Grace has done so well being a big sister.  She is anxiously waiting for James to be able to play with her.  It is so hard having to wait!  James has recently grown big enough and strong enough to graduate from his playmat on the ground to his activity center.  I found Grace happily "reading" to him and he was loving it!

Grace actually read him many more books and I am sure, quite soon, she will really be reading the words to him!  She is such a big help for me, whether it is getting a burb cloth, or letting Kylie out when I am feeding James.  I just love watching her loving on her brother.  

Is there anything better than the smiles of children?  I am so thankful for all of these activities.  For all of the hugs and kisses, for all of the hours of play.  For all of the special moments and the milestones.  All of these things are worth hanging on to and worth remembering.  

Recently I was talking with a number of friends about the power of testimony.  Sometimes we forget just how much our small, little moments can have a big impact on someone else.  I remember hearing a very long time ago, that it is the current things that we should be sharing with those around us.  The big testimonies have a place, the life changing ways God has acted in our life, yes, those are worth sharing.  But don't forget to tell someone else about the little ways that you know Jesus is with you and listening to your cries for help.  I love to hear how others have seen Jesus in their day to day struggles.  It brings me so much encouragement and certainly deepens my faith and hope.  For me, each of the stories above are evidence of Jesus' love and care for me.  I feel his presence with me as I go from activity to activity.  He knows exactly what I need each day.  Being able to be with my kids and my grandkids is something I do not take for granted.  It is truly a blessing and a joy.  

Jesus, thank you for the daily ways that you meet us exactly where we are.   No matter how busy we are, you are never going to leave us.  Holy Spirit, thank you for reminding me to capture these milestone moments with my family, no matter how small they may seem.  Jesus help us to be willing to share our struggles and our small moments with those around us.  Amen

Family time to remember Ken

 Last weekend was the one year anniversary of Ken's death.  As a family we decided it would be really nice to remember Ken at one of his favorite locations - The Morton Arboretum.  We picked a time and prayed for good weather and we were not disappointed.  It was a simply glorious fall day with sunshine and cool breezes and temperatures in the 70's.  Just getting all 11 (now 12) of us somewhere is quite a job in itself.  Yes, we are now 12 since Lia has a boyfriend, Micah,  that we happily welcomed for this event.  I am sure that Ken would have been more than willing to embarrass Lia by asking Micah all kinds of questions.  For me, it was a perfect way to embrace our family growing and changing as we walk into the future.  

Ken so loved the "Trolls" exhibit at the Arboretum and took so many photos of them.  He would have loved this new exhibit that includes 5 large statues.  Each of us saw something different in them and appreciated them differently.  They are truly art and therefore whatever you see is okay!  I happened to catch the following picture...

This would make Ken so happy!  Usually Gwen and Susie are the photographers in the family.  And now Ellie also always seems to have her camera in her hand (see my previous blog about this).  But Doug just isn't usually seen like this.  Susie was "baby wearing" James, so that might explain Doug having the camera.  But it just makes me smile so much seeing him "walking in his dads footsteps'.  

The kids had such a good time, running around and playing together.  We had a snack time and ate some of Ken's favorite things.  His "special mix" granola was a favorite and also the apple cider donuts.  We munched on sausage and cheese and crackers while the kids played a rousing game of tag. 

Here are a couple more of my favorite pictures from the day.  We spent several hours hiking through the woods to find all five statues.  Because it was beautiful day, the Arboretum was busy.  But because it is so big, (and we avoided the buildings) the crowds didn't bother us much.   On the way back to the cars, I picked up these three special reminders of the day....

I loved this very big leaf.  You can't really tell by this picture, but it is much bigger than my hand.  I love the small pinecone and the tiny acorn also.  The leaf seems to represent a bit about my life.  Some of the life is gone, but there is still some green left there. My life as "us" is done, but I have more ahead. And the acorn and pinecone suggest new life.  I love that Jesus has chosen to speak to me in times of grief, through songs on the radio.  After Lucas' death in 2014 this song Tell Your Heart to Beat Again by Danny Gokey was always on the radio.  It spoke to me so clearly that Jesus had so much ahead for our family.   I was really not expecting that to happen again.  And then  Scars in Heaven by Casting Crowns played on my radio.  It took me a long time to take in all that this song was saying to me.  This verse touched my heart so much..

I know the road you walked was anything but easy.  You picked up your share of scars along the way. Oh but now your standing in the sun, you've fought your fight your race is won, the pain is all a million miles away.  

Ken had so many health issues through out his entire life.  This verse really captured that for me and spoke so much hope and joy into my heart.  And then it concludes with this verse...

There's not a day goes by that I don't see you. You live on in all the better parts of me. Until I'm standing with you in the sun, I'll fight this fight and this race I'll run, until I finally see what you can see.

I've been searching and asking for Jesus to show me a direction for the years ahead.  And here it is.  I will keep on in this fight - whatever that is. If it is Covid and shutdowns and pandemic issues, I will get through it.  I will keep on running the race that is before me.  Doing and being the best mom and grandma that I can be.  Serving Jesus in whatever ways I can.  Making a difference to those around me and those I may never meet personally.  I will always carry a part of Ken with me.  And it is comforting to know that he lives on through the kids and grandkids.  What a great legacy.  

To all those who are themselves in times of grief, sadness or suffering, know that Jesus loves you and cares so much for you.  He sees us all - exactly as we are.  Trust me, he will send the exact message we need at the appropriate time.  Just keep your eyes and ears open and he will speak to you.  

Jesus, thank you for the comfort of music and songs that touch the deepest parts of our being.  Holy Spirit, remind us to treasure every moment we have with our family and friends and with you.  Give us courage to stay open to what you are saying to us and wisdom to know your voice.   Thank you for nature, for trees and for tiny little pine cones.  Amen

 

First Special Sleepover with Anna and Grace

These girls have been waiting a long time to have a sleepover at my house.  I finally got a new guest room set up and have a great new daybed and trundle set up - perfect for a sleepover.  Anna was counting down the days.  We started the activities with a snack and then walked to my neighborhood

playground. 

Watching these cousins play and have so much fun together was wonderful.  Sadly our time playing was cut short by a rainstorm.  There was no rain in the forecast but the sky turned dark and then the drops began to fall.  We ended up walking quickly to get home before the showers really started.  I ordered pizza and the girls watched a movie, before heading to bed. 

Surprisingly, the girls went to sleep before 10:30pm and were still asleep when I woke up at 7:00am!  That was a miracle for sure.  The parents were coming to pick up the girls around noon, so we had a lot of playing to do!  It was a marvelous day, 70's and sunny, so we went outside after they did a bit of "work" at the table.  Anna had drawn a picture for us to all color together so we completed that. We all had to color one of the flowers and write our name.  This masterpiece is now hanging on my  fridge. 

  

We had bubbles and chalk and the girls spent a long time blowing lots of bubbles.  I think I had more fun the girls did.  

Later in the morning we went out front and decided it was time for a game of hopscotch.  It is always interesting seeing kids enjoy a game that I played for hours as a young girl.  I couldn't tell you how many games of hopscotch I played, back in the day.  Interestingly, I don't really remember Gwen playing much, so maybe it is one of those things that skips a generation.

The timing of this sleepover was good.  We planned it so that we could do our family remembrance of Ken after the pickup.  The only downside to this, was that both Anna and Grace were really tired and by the end of the day, they needed to be done! Watch for the next blog to see how our family time went.  But all in all, it was a great first sleepover.  

For Anna this was a very big event.  The rule in the Johnson household is that no sleepovers are allowed unless you are vaccinated.  Sadly, Anna and Zeke are not old enough to receive the COVID vaccine.  But because we have allowed our family to be together during the pandemic, Gwen and Tim allowed Anna to spend the night at my house.  Anna was very nervous.  So was Grace, since she had never spent the night with me at my house either.  COVID has really done a number on the kids.  Grace really doesn't have any memories before the shutdown happened when she was just 3.   We are just getting used to what is now our new normal.  

The timing of this sleepover was also very good for me.  I knew that this weekend, the one year anniversary of Ken's death, would be difficult.  I had been dreading the date approaching and, just is so often the case, the actual weekend actually passed quite well.   I am so thankful for the relationship that I have with each of my grandchildren.  It is so wonderful to see how they are growing in their gifts and talents.  This kind of one on one time (or actually two on one time) is so valuable.  Each time I get to be with the kids doing fun things, I try to just soak it in.  Time passes so quickly and the kids are growing up.  I don't want to miss a minute of it.  I love how Jesus has given me this time to spend with the kids.  In spite of Covid, in spite of Ken's death, my life has been filled with blessings.  Yes, a yearly time to reflect is a very good thing.  Making the effort to see the blessings, to embrace the time and to notice the little things is such a gift.  

 Jesus, thank you for the gift of children and grandchildren.  Holy Spirit, keep us aware of all of the blessings that surround us and help us to embrace each day.  Thank you for times to reflect and remember.   Keep our hearts open to your prompts every day.    Amen