It is a small world!

 It has been a reflective few days for me.  Yesterday my sister Julie, who just died in January of this year, would have turned 76.  And tomorrow it will be two years since Ken died.  Grief is a funny thing.  At the least expected moment, suddenly there are reminders and you realize that you just don't feel "right".  That aptly describes how I was feeling on Friday.  It took me a little while to understand exactly what I had been feeling.  Thankfully, I was able to connect the feelings to the facts of the time.  I miss both my sister and Ken more at these times.  It was also a drab, cloudy and cold day on Friday, which certainly contributed to my depressed emotions.  But then, Saturday, I had one of those "you just can't make this stuff up" happen.

It has been 50 years since I graduated high school.  Wow, it is really interesting to actually put that on paper.  The top picture is my yearbook from 1972.  There are eight yearbooks from Elk Grove High School, sitting on a shelf in my bedroom closet.  Four of these are Ken's (1968-1971) and four of these are mine (1969-1972).  I recently looked at this stack and thought, "Why am I hanging on to these?  I should probably throw them out."  On Saturday I was especially glad that I did not follow through with that and toss these in the garbage.  Let me tell you a little story....

Years and years ago (think 48 or 49 years), Ken and I had a small group of  "couple" friends who we spent most Friday or Saturday evenings, enjoying games and laughter.  Some couples were just dating, some were soon to be married and some were already married.  There were a few single friends also.  

When I think back to those evenings, usually we were pretty crowded into someone's small apartment living room.  I often think back to those impromptu parties and wonder about those friends from our early years.  After a short while, we all moved to new places, new jobs and newer friends.  So we lost touch with most of this crowd.  Ken and I stayed in contact with my good friend Marie and her husband Dave.  In the last few years, Marie and I discovered that her daughter lives very close to Gwen and Tim.  Pretty surprising since this is a really large metropolitan area and Marie and Dave lived in Wisconsin since shortly after their marriage.  

Part of the reason that Ken and I lost contact with most of this group of friends, is also a big part of my faith journey.  I don't know exactly how it happened, but several of these couples were part of the Bahai faith.  They had a plan to try to persuade Ken and I to join their faith and begin meeting with them.  We received several invitations to private meetings to discuss Bahai with them, we were given material and books to read and there was a pretty big push for us to join their fellowship.  I had been raised in the Lutheran church and Ken was raised Presbyterian.   While we enjoyed this group of friends and wanted to remain in their circle, we were not interested in joining Bahai.  I am very thankful for my pastor at the time (he actually married Ken and I).  I asked to meet with him and we had a long discussion about Bahai.  He helped me to put words to my faith and not be swayed by this group.  This was the first time that my faith in Jesus was put to the test.  It was a defining moment for me and helped me to move forward confidently knowing that Jesus was my true Savior.  Unfortunately, we were basically cut out of fellowship with these "friends" after we stood our ground and rejected Bahai. 

If you are still following along, here is the REASON for this story today.  This year, I decided to actually "join" Gwen and Tim's church - Fellowship of Faith.  Recently, the church has started a Bible Reading plan on the YouVersion Bible app.  Last week, out of curiosity, I was scanning the list of people who had signed up for this Bible reading plan.  I happened upon a very unusual first name.  I have only ever known (or heard of) one person with this name.  And it was one of those friends from the story I just shared.  I actually knew this gal WAY BACK in high school.  We shared many classes together and had many mutual friends, including my friend Marie.  Ken and I and Marie and Dave attended this friends wedding, held at the Bahai Temple in Evanston.   Shortly after this, I totally lost contact with her.  After a few years, Marie also no longer had a good address for her and knew that she had been divorced.    Over the years, she was someone who would come to mind and I would wonder where she ended up.  

When I finally remembered to actually ask Gwen if she knew this person from the Bible plan, she said "Of course, why?"  I gave her a quick back story and she proceeded to text this gal's daughter - who happens to be someone that Gwen knows well.  She asked if her mother had happened to attend Elk Grove High School, which was certainly an odd question coming out of the blue.  When the answer was yes, I was just amazed.  Here this "lost" friend from 50 years ago, is actually attending the same church as me.  As a matter of fact, her family is actually a part of my new small group "Table Dinner".  I had been at a dinner with her, talked briefly with her about her grandkids, but never realized who she was!  

What an amazing story of just how small our world really is.  When I messaged Marie that I had found Lalin, she was so surprised and asked me to forward her information so they could connect.  

The best part of this story for me is that I found her through a Bible reading plan.  I thought that I had lost her because of her decision to be a part of Bahai.  But God is faithful!  What a wonderful reminder that Jesus is drawing people to himself.  I can't wait to spend some time catching up with her and hearing her journey to knowing more about Jesus.  Wow, am I thankful that she is doing this Bible Plan with me!

Isn't it amazing who personal Jesus is?  This connection didn't just happen.  Jesus is in it for sure!  Last night I was considering this - that Jesus would care so much that he would bring this person back into my life after almost 50 years.  More than that, Jesus reminded me of this very important part of my faith journey, one that I had not remembered or even thought about.  Thanks to this event, my first adult decision to follow Jesus will now be included in my book.  I am looking forward to connecting more with my long lost friend in the weeks ahead!

Jesus, I am totally humbled that you would care about me and this small event in my life.  Thank you for using everything in our life to draw us even closer to you.  Holy Spirit, thank you for bringing me to Fellowship of Faith.  Continue to bless those that developed the YouVersion Bible app that has made Your word accessible to so many.  Thank you Jesus, for being with me as I grieve Julie and Ken.  Holy Spirit, comfort all who mourn.  Thank you Jesus for your plans and purposes for each of us.  Amen

Behind the scenes (for a really long time)...

I have been doing this blog since May, 2013. There are, in fact 842 blog posts that have been read an astonishing 74.1 million times, by people in more than 26 countries.  I never expected that people would read these posts and I never expected to see this blog still happening in 2022.  I have never really shared exactly how and why this blog even came into being.  So, I think it is finally time to share a deeper view into the last more than 9 years.  It is time to finally admit to the world (and myself,) "I am a writer". 

Several years before the beginning of this blog, I had thought about, talked about and considered writing.  While not that unusual, it was really out of my "wheelhouse" - not something that I had ever thought I would do.  In the 1990's and early 2000's I had spent time creating curriculum for children's programing that had proved to be quite successful.  One of my pastors at the time, had encouraged me to try to get some of this material published.  However, during that season of my life, I had neither the time or the money to do that.  I love to read and have spent much time with a book in my hands.  Many a night I didn't get enough sleep because I just couldn't put that book down!  Some of my earliest memories are at a public library.  I had my own library card at 6 years old!  Something that was not common in 1960.  While I loved books, I really didn't consider writing one.  

Soon after my mom died in 2011, I had a very vivid dream in which my mom appeared.  She gave me a golden tray with a pen on it and she said "You must write it".  This was the first dream I had about my mom since her death and it was very real.  I had been kicking around the idea of starting a blog (which was very popular in 2012) but I just couldn't arrive at a catchy name for my blog.  After several months of trying to figure out a name, Gwen told me "Just start the blog under your own name!  Who cares what it is called!"  So, I obediently set out as a new blogger.  In those early years, Google was sharing blogs opening across many platforms and I suddenly had readers from all over the world.  It was an encouragement to continue to put my thoughts, my ideas - my life into these blogs.  They became a diary of sorts, that I knew would be passed on to my grandchildren and that seemed like enough reason to continue  to write them. 

The idea that there was more to the writing than a blog, never left me.  I started to feel that the story I needed to write was about my grandparents - my mother's parents.  Because I really didn't have much information about them or their early life, it seemed to me that it would be a fictional story based on their life.  So I sat down at my computer and suddenly the pages were filled with words.  When I closed my computer that first day, I had no idea where it would lead me.  The next time I opened that document, I was stunned to read the words that I had written. And the outline of this story just flooded my mind.  However, it just seemed like some kind of silly thing.  Really, who actually writes a book? Certainly not me.  I wrote a few pages, here and there.  I would open the document, read a few pages, write a couple paragraphs and then close the document.  Gwen has never stopped encouraging me to keep on writing. I certainly needed that encouragement.  

Last Thursday I was invited to dinner by my distant cousin Dave Anderson and his wife, Carolyn.  He and I connected several years ago through a family Facebook group.  Due to Covid it has been years since we have talked.  At our dinner, Dave was excited to share with me that he had been thinking that possibly I should write a book about our common family - my dad's parents!  He had no idea that I was currently writing about my mom's parents.  

So, here we are now in 2022.  I have the first part of a three part book, mostly written.  I have begun writing part two and part three.  In the last few weeks, additional book ideas have more or less fallen into my lap.  I have begun to get serious about writing, joining some writing groups and registering for conferences.  I have been thinking about who might read the book I am writing.  I have been considering what should be added and subtracted from the words already on the pages.  Not many people know that I have been writing a book.  Very few know the story line of these writings.  But it seems very real to me, all of a sudden.  Now, you all know!

Behind this entire writing project is the sure knowledge that Jesus is in it all.  It was a prompting from the Holy Spirit, that even had me considering writing this blog.  I knew that I wanted to share the amazing way that Jesus was living and active in and through me.  The very idea and story line of this book was a revelation of the Holy Spirit.  One thing is certain, for reasons that I can't understand, I am a writer.  Over the next few weeks, months and (most likely) years, I will need to keep reminding myself, I am a writer!  

Jesus, thank you for your plans and purposes for each of us that you have had since before we were born.  Holy Spirit, help us to be open to the ways you choose to use us, even when they seem so out of possibility.  Jesus, you are a God of the impossible!  Thank you for continuing to provide the nudges that we need to fulfill your plans for us.  Give us courage to walk out these plans without fearing what people will think.  Thank you for your love and care for each of us.  Amen

Sunny, warm family time, reflections on the past year and looking ahead!

 We all got together at an incredible park, half way between the Johnson and Rowley homes.  We have great difficulty finding a time that everyone is available to be together.  So this day was a special treat to help me celebrate my recent birthday.  This park was extra special with something for every age from Jimmy all the way through the adults.  We had a short break to have some snacks and the kids all enjoyed a special treat of freeze pops that Doug and Susie provided.  It was over 80 degrees so that was a welcome cooling and hydrating snack!  The kids climbed, ran, played tag, and all of them (except Jimmy) went down a really cool long metal slide placed into the side of a big hill.  These times together, are especially good when the kids leave tired and ready for the ride home.  

These last two years have really gone by quickly.  At times it feels like a very long time since Ken died.  But then there are those days that it seems like he was just here.  One of the things that happened in the last weeks was an unexpected needed repair to my home.  The ceiling drywall in Ken's camera room cracked in several places and began to fall.  It was open to the attic in several places.  Thanks to Doug's quick actions, everything was moved out of the room.  I was able to get a local handyman to come within a few hours.  Apparently, when my house was built in 1977, they used nails instead of screws to hang the drywall.  And after years, it just dries out and the nails give way and the longer span of drywall begins to fail.  This handyman was able to support the ceiling with temporary bracing and came back two days later to make the permanent repairs.  I am incredibly thankful that we have mostly cleared out and stored all of Ken's camera equipment so nothing was damaged. The two years seemed more real after these repairs were made. 

Last week I shared some Instagram posts that I wrote as a special writing project.  I am making an effort to write every day in this next year.  I have a large project that I have been working on for several years and I would like to complete it by this time next year.  I don't want to stop blogging, so I will be (hopefully) posting a bit more regularly that I have been. Blogging has seemed overwhelming in the last few months.  All of a sudden, it doesn't seem quite as daunting to me!  So get ready for more words from me!

Today in church, we sang  Revelation Song It was such a great worshipful experience, one that I much needed.  I will most likely have this song on repeat over the next few weeks. Being in this place of worship is a great place to begin a new year for me and a good place to end this blog. Join me in worship by clicking on the song.  

Jesus, we are filled with wonder at your name. You are the breath and the living water that sustains us.  Thank you for family times and wonderful times of worship.  Holy Spirit, help us to stay in this place of worship as we go into a new week.  Amen