So much has changed in the last three years!

 Three years ago, our world changed.  We were locked down. Kept in our houses.  Fear was so great that at any time, our family could be hit with this "mystery virus".  Ken and I were mostly at home anyway, since he was not doing well physically.  The long stint in the ICU in January/February  2020 had left us shaken.  And  knowing that his health was compromised, we were thinking that our lives would never look the same.  And that was most certianly true.  

During one of my recent times watching Grace and Jimmy, I captured this photo of Jimmy "cooking" his play food!

He is quite the kiddo!  His vocabulary, at 22 months, is unbelievable and matched only by his climbing abilities.  He can scale a table faster than anything.  But on this day, I was especially thinking about all that has changed in three years.  It will always be sad to remember that Ken never got to know his little "namesake" (James Kenneth Rowley).  Jimmy is so much like Doug and I know Ken would have appreciated seeing Doug trying to "wrangle" Jimmy into his booster chair. Jimmy is one determined kid and if he doesn't want to do it, there is no getting it done.  These kids who were born or lived during the pandemic, are a different breed.   It is as if God has gifted them an added dose of stamina and vitality to survive and thrive.  It will be amazing to watch just what they accomplish in the future.  As hard as it was on the adults to get through this world changing event, it was even harder on the kids.

At first three years ago,  I was mostly worried for the kids.  They all had jobs and families and I tried to imagine how difficult this situation would be for them.  Doug and Susie had a preschooler and were trying to work from home, while keeping a three year old busy.  Gwen and Tim had a slightly better situation because they were already homeschooling the kids.  Tim was able to work from home and didn't have a long commute.  Gwen's job was another story.  Church workers were faced with an almost impossible situation.  Would church have to stop?  What exactly was going to happen.  Nobody really knew.  

That first year, 2020,  Palm Sunday, Maundy Thursday, Good Friday and Easter passed in a cold, sterile fashion.  Reality hit us all, realizing that we were seperated from our families at a time when we were so used to being together.  There were no new spring dresses.  No Easter Egg hunts, No family dinner.  In my heart I was already grieving these times, since I just had an inner "knowing" that Ken's time was short.  No one knew just how long this was going to last.  

After Ken had several very challenging hospital visits and doctor appointments that I was not allowed to attend, I had sort of reached my limit.  Thankfully, the kids recognized this and stepped in.  Finally, in early May, we "celebrated" Easter with the kids.  

Gwen and Tim had managed to sell their home and buy a new one, in the midst of this pandemic.  It was truely a God thing!  I can't tell you how grateful I was to see those grandkids again!  

And here we are, three years later.  Ken has been gone for two and half of those three years.  The kids have grown and changed and of course, we have added Jimmy to our family.  These have been years of adjustments for me.  No longer married, but widowed.  No longer we but me.  Family times together are now cherished in a way that feels different than three years ago.  I just took those times for granted.  But now, each time I am with the kids, I feel the thankfulness and joy of being together.  I love to have the kids sit by me or run up to give me hugs.  I even appreciate the dogs joyful greeting when I get to their house.  Sitting across the table from friends just sharing and laughing together, is the sweetest thing.  Gathering together with my church family has a new meaning, after a time of just watching on a screen.  Being with my adult children brings me such joy and peace.  My life is truly blessed.  

Recently someone asked me how long I plan on seeing my grandkids every week.  At first, I couldn't quite understand the question!  Being with my kids and grandkids is a privilege not a burden.  Caring for Grace and Jimmy one day a week and spending a day with Anna, Zeke, Ellie and Lia fills my heart and my spirit in ways nothing else would.  My answer to that question was - "A very long time hopefully!' Looking ahead three years, I am sure there will be many changes.  But it is with great hope, faith and trust that I walk out into the future.  

I am learning so much from my grandchildren.  Each time I see them, I am amazed at the people they are becoming.  They have a confidence that is unlike any past generation.  They believe that they can change the world for the better and I believe that they will.  Some may see this as the darkest time in the history of the United States.  But I am encouraged by the courage and boldness that I see in the youth today.  They see the problems around us, but they are also seeing ways that they can solve some of those issues.  I am so proud of the Christ followers they are!

It has been three long years since that first "lock-down" of the pandemic.  Yes, some things have been changed forever.  But Jesus is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.  Having Jesus in my life has been the key to seeing me through the changes.  Jesus gives me the courage to face whatever is ahead.  And Jesus is the peace that passes understanding when there seemingly is no peace around us.  I was thinking this week about this line from the 23rd Psalm -

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.

These three years have felt like a valley - far from the mountain top.  And the shadow of death seemed to loom around us.  We heard daily reports about the number of deaths from Covid-19.  Fear, discouragment and doubt were in every home.  The smiles and laughter were hidden from view by the masks we had to wear.  But, see the good news in that passage!  We are walking THROUGH the valley.  We did not have to stay there forever.  It was truly a season.  We have walked through it and now are on the other side.  There is no better news than that!  

Jesus, thank you so much for sending the Holy Spirit who is with us and in us!  Thank you for the peace that fills us in times of trouble.  Keep our eyes focused on you, as we continue to walk forward.  Give us courage and boldness as we face the future.  Thank you for hugs and smiles and time together. Amen