Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Putting together the pieces of being a grandma.....

Yesterday I helped Anna do a few puzzles.  She sat for a LONG time for a little 16 month old.  She knew exactly what had to happen and how to position the pieces over the spots and move them side to side until they fit.  This particular puzzle has sounds that are activated when the piece is put in place.  She laughed every time.  I love to do jigsaw puzzles.  I have been known to have more than one partially done puzzle taking up space on our dining room table.  And I was remembering how the Holy Spirit once had me focusing on jigsaw puzzles for several months!  Each piece of the puzzle has a specific place and the picture can not be complete if even one small piece is missing.  Furthermore, there are adjoining parts of the picture that are just waiting for that one piece.  And even though there might be many pieces that "LOOK" similar, only one is an exact match. Each of us are like those puzzle pieces.  We have a place that we "fit" and a picture that we help to complete.  And Jesus will speak to us and show us exactly where we need to be.  Remembering a great lesson from puzzles.

Yesterday my heart was hurting for another family who were facing a hard situation with the birth of a precious baby boy, born with Trisomy 18.  My small group has been praying for this family for the last several months, as they have been expecting little Samuel.  Babies with this genetic disorder do not have a very good prognosis.  As a matter of fact, only a small percentage are actually born alive. Little Samuel was very much alive.  And there was a picture of Samuel, being held by his grandma with his mom looking on.  I had such a feeling of connection to that grandma.  And I knew exactly how she was feeling.  As a grandma you have your own special connection to that new little life. It is hard to find the words to describe the immediate love you feel for that new grandchild.  But for Samuel's grandma, it was also the pain of watching your own child in this impossible situation.  Not only are you heartbroken over the predicted loss of this sweet baby, but you also are watching your own son or daughter in the midst of the worst possible situation..... the impending loss of their child.   Yes, this hit me in the gut this morning.  I was missing Lucas.  

And then I was remembering the day that I became a grandma for the first time.  And it was 9 years ago tomorrow!  Lia will be 9 tomorrow.  She texted me today that she was so excited about her birthday.  Suddenly, she seems so old.  But I was thinking about this picture.  There I am, a brand new grandma, with Gwen and a brand new Lia.  
Isn't it interesting that all of the shifting around that has happened in my life, brought me to this small group and in that, made me aware of Samuel and his family.  I don't know what Jesus has in mind for this, but it feels like one of those times that my piece of the puzzle is fitting together.  I know that I am praying for this family very differently than I would have before Lucas died.  In spite of how things look right now, there is hope because of Jesus.  Even in the loss, there is love. And there is hope.  Little Samuel is being held and loved in the arms of his family.  

Nothing seems to be more important than this tonight.  Peace is a person....Jesus.  So this is how I am praying tonight.  For my family and for Samuel and his family.  

Jesus, thank you for reminding me that you place us exactly where you know we need to be.  Thank you for my small group and all of the connections I have made through them.  Jesus, reach out with your peace and comfort to Samuel and his family in this difficult situation.  Thank you for being so near and so real to me since the loss of Lucas.  Thank you for new life and new beginnings.  Holy Spirit, thank you for Lia and the blessing she is to our family. Continue to fill her with your presence. Thank you for the peace that you bring in every situation!  Amen

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